Karen Got Wheels

Trailers vs. Paninis... you choose

2010-06-28T21:02:00.005-04:00

Everyone who has ever been injured knows the frustration... you cant ride, or ride well, but your friends can. You know, the frozen face... "Oh, that's sooooo GREAT!!!!" comment when they do well, when you are stuck at home. Not that I'm not happy or anything, but lets face it, you vs. me... I'm small enough, that you loose. Kind of, except that I really am glad for you, mostly.

Here is my physical therapy torture of the day.... get strapped in and attached to a thingie in the ceiling... and then WALK on a treadmill at 1.5 mph. Easy? Too easy? Now turn 1/4 turn to the left, and don't trip over your feet and now walk side ways. Then turn 1/4 and walk backwards... turn 1/4 and walk sideways and then repeat... Now bump up the speed and reverse it.

Ok, try that and then tell me about your latest fast ride. I must have clown feet.., and about fell on my face. But... I am retraining my hip, and I am getting used to the heel lifts. And maybe when I'm thru suffering thru this shit my hip will last a few more years.

Of course I had my own experience tonight... Karen vs. the trailer. I went out after a very brief thunderstorm that barely lowered the 100+ degree temps, and increased significantly the already ghastly humidity. On the way back, on a very narrow road, I could see the on coming truck. And... I could hear the truck coming from behind. Then I heard the trailer the truck coming from behind... you know, the out of control, bouncing, completely out of control, kill you in a heart beat trailer noise that strikes fear into every rural cyclist noise? Yeah, that one... And I didn't hear the truck behind me slowing, and didn't see the truck in front of me slowing, and I knew that things were about to get tight, quick.

So I took that page out of the Steve Martin skit about "Gettin' Small!" Which I have perfected at work... and did my darnedest to just disappear... And somehow, by the grace of God, I got so small that I squeezed thru. Deep breath, and a wee bit of pee later, I made it.

Guys, you aren't the only ones. Women CAN pee on the bike. I proved it.

Oh well. It's true.

And...
While you were racing and kicking butt I came up with the PERFECT panini recipe... Enjoy!

1 loaf of your favorite panini style bread
Really good brie cheese
1 nicely ripe pear
oven roasted turkey breast
Pam Olive oil spray

thinly slice the bread, layer thin slices of pear, thick slices of turkey and med. slices of brie...heat your panini press (0r like I use a George Forman Lean Mean Fat Grillin' Machine) and spray the bread with olive oil Pam... Heat until the bread caramelizes but doesn't burn...

Then Eat! Damn, they're good! Just a hint of sweetness from the pear, mixed with the meaty goodness of the turkey is wonderful! Easy, smeazy. Yum~ (BTW... serve with a nice Riesling or Savignon Blanc... )

Please run over ESPN employees...

2010-03-18T14:04:00.002-04:00

No I dont mean it. Really dont mean it. But how would ESPN management feel if that was what WE were telling people to do... You know, dont run them over to kill them, just to hurt them bad enough that they couldnt tell people to hurt US.

I called ESPN and told them flatly that if they dont fire Tony Kornheiser, I'm going on a letter writing campaign. To their advertisers. Hit them where the rubber meets the road, or something like that. Fringe group? Uh, look at the typical cyclist= well educated, highly employed, with discretionary spending. If we all ever decided to make a change, we could do it by our sheer economic force alone.

I'm very lucky living out in the hinterlands where most people know me. Instead of having bottles thrown at me, I usually get a friendly waive. On the rare time that something gets said to me, its usually that, a word.

Not everyone is so lucky. To have this come on the heels of a cyclist killed in NC while riding on the SHOULDER...

Tony Kornheiser, I surely hope your days are numbered.

Just a little less of me

2010-03-09T12:04:00.002-05:00

A friend sent me an email complaining that the blogisphere has gotten a wee bit empty with my absence. While I seriously doubt that anyone notices, here we go...

Its been an interesting winter. Interesting is a good word... kind of leaves a nebulous feel to it without actually describing anything. Somehow that is a pretty good description of a winter full of snow, little to no riding, stress, tummy troubles that I thought was stress, and my new black, blue, green and yellow tummy.

Turns out stress has a new name, gall bladder. Yeah mine turned out to be defective and had to come out. Once Marc got his hands to stop shaking, he ripped it out. Or maybe thats why I have 4 holes... too much shaking. I thought that Marc had two hands, the other holes must have been for PRACTICE!

Now I did notice in the photos that Marc gave me that there was some extraneous yellow stuff left over. I would have thought that a buddy would have taken that out while he was in there dumpster diving through my intestines.

The worst part? Choose one... mouth like the Sahara until my bestest buddy J snuck me diet Cokes. (which she got yelled at for doing, but J was not going to let her fearless leader damn die of thirst...) Almost barfing in J's car on the way home even though J was technically going the speed limit as she hit every pothole on Patterson Ave... Or maybe being 8 months pregnant for days with the mother of all gas bubbles... My pick, itchy surgical glue. I'm thinking its a new torture device.

The best part? The best friends a cranky girl could ever have. From Mike who drove me at 5 am, to J who made sure that I was taken care of, Marc and crew who put up with my weird sense of humor (although the Scottish anesthesiologist didn't quite appreciate my saying that Marc was going to rip anything out... ) and all my buds that made sure that I laughed my way through it all.

In the meantime, until I can write about getting dropped in races, here is a treat for my vegetarian fans. Us carnivores like it, too!

Garlicy white bean dip

1 15 oz can of cannelloni beans
2 tbsp of roast garlic (recipe below)
dash of olive oil
pinch of salt

get a nice size head of your favorite garlic, cut the top of the head off and lightly anoint with olive oil. Put in tin foil and bake in the oven for 40 min at 350 degrees. Peel off any extra "paper" and squeeze the now roasted garlic out into a bowl. Mash. (You can use this as a spread all on its own, the roasting takes out the harsh garlic taste. Honest)

Drain beans and heat in the microzapper for 1 minute. Put beans, garlic paste, a splash of olive oil and a pinch of salt into a food processor. Whip into a smooth consistency.

Yum, yum, good. Serve on pita chips, make a great sandwich with roasted veggies, or a dip for veggies. Yum. Really.

Germs, or how I came to love the new TV...

2010-01-04T18:41:00.002-05:00

Wednesday of last week I had a ripping headache. That's kind of to be expected as work has been a wee bit stressful as of late. Thursday, the ripping headache had a serious sinus aspect to it. I still managed to get in a fairly decent run, however. Yeah, unless you were watching me coughing up lung cheese...

Friday morning, Cliff blessed me by running with me. Seriously, almost all of my runs have been alone alone'O. Having someone else along to kick my butt is a very desirable thing. Unfortunately, about mile 2.5 I had to make an exit, stage left. I was getting dizzy, my heart was racing, and I felt like 6 gnomes were sitting on my chest.

No worries though, it didn't stop me from eating breakfast later at Panera. Sick, yes. Anorexic, not a chance...

Saturday was worse. Sunday was even worse.

Cliff gave me the Antichrist for Christmas. Yeah, a 42" plasma tv. Its HUGE. (And as my friend Marky Mark says, HDTV has ruined porn...) He's right. You can see every pore on every actor. In case you thought they were better looking than you... NOT! Ok, maybe they are, but they have zits, too.

Saturday I watched a whole afternoon of America's Next Top Model. Yeah, I know it doesn't exactly fit. Watching all the angst of trying to be perfect, just had a little poetic justice to it. This said from someone whose only piece of jewelry that is normally worn is a Timex Ironman Watch. You know, the 30 lap one.

Sunday, there was a House marathon on USA. Now I know marathons. All 23 of them. A tv show is not a marathon. Even if they show it all day... Ok, but now I'm hooked. Who couldn't be hooked on a vicodin addicted doctor, who actually figures things out and is a only a little more OCD than me? Ok, I don't understand the addiction thing. I have a whole medicine cabinet full of pain meds that I never took. I'm too scared to flush them down the commode... as I have a septic tank and I sure as hell don't want to unintentionally drink them when they filter down to the aquifer again.

But I'm sure that I probably didn't need the pain pills all those times the doctors prescribed them to me and I didn't take them. Someone was certainly flushing theirs (or peeing theirs) down the toilet and maybe that's why I never really had to take them. I probably was drinking them thru my well...

Now I just need to figure out what to do with all that stuff. It's grown to be quite the Elvis Box...

Being sick sucks. All you do is lay around, cough up all kinds of nasty gunk and think about things like Elvis boxes, the dust on the ceiling fan, and how much work is going to get you back when you return.

The dogs sure have liked having me laid up on the couch though. I guess its all in how you look at it.

I really didn't think I looked like an ax murderer...

2009-12-07T20:22:00.002-05:00

After a really craptastic day at work, I decided to go for a run thru the high end section of Richmond. I still haven't gotten fully back in the running mode, and am full in weenie bike mode. So I had on tights, a long sleeve shirt and my garish Rostello light winter jacket. Yeah, I looked like a Christmas tree. Colorful.

As I got down by St Christophers Private School, I saw this Mercedes SUV swerve but run over something that looked like glass. As I got closer, I saw a box, and glass. Something just wasn't right.

Once I got there, I realized... not glass... roofing nails.

All those Muffy Soccer Mom's, picking up thier private school kids... rolling down that hill over roofing nails... Ok, I'm evil, but not that evil. So I started to try to get the Muffettes to stop...

Stops? Stop for the crazy woman in mis-matched running gear? Heaven forbid! You would have thought that I was an axe murderer. Or Ted Bundy. Although, Ted Bundy didn't have any trouble getting women to stop for him...

I did manage to get a couple little old ladies to stop. But they looked really scared until I told them why I was waiving them off. At this point I just got pissed and went on with my run.

On my way back there was a nice man out with a push broom trying to sweep the nails out of the road. I stopped to tell him of my earlier travails... and dodged a few cars who were determined to run our asses over. He said that he was about done trying to be nice. People just wouldn't slow down even though he was under a street light.

So if you hear of a slew of flat tires in Richmond tommorrow, don't feel sorry for the people. Us serial killers tried to warn them...

The new meaning of "EPIC"

2009-12-05T20:23:00.002-05:00

I officiated today at the Virginia cyclocross champs at Darden Towe... great course, great promoter and finally, real little Belgian kind of weather. You know what I'm talking about, 30 something degrees, snow on top of slop, and a course the consistency of baby bad stuff.

Yeah, epic.

Good thing for me that I've replenished my truck after J hijacked it and cleaned it out. I had on tights, chinos, 3 shirts, a hat, a heavy jacket, gloves, wool socks and rubber rain boots. I still froze. Next time I'm putting those battery operated hunter's socks in the bike kit bag. I might as well have left the gloves at home as I couldn't write and wear them at the same time.

If there was ever a course where bike handling played a tremendous role, it was this one. If you could ride smoothly on slop, you had a great day. If you couldn't, you didn't. If you had a pit bike... you had a huge advantage. If you didn't you carried 10 lbs of ice, mud and "stuff" jammed into your brakes, deraileurs etc... There were some very talented riders out there that had a field day, and many who suffered big time. I salute you all. Just showing up on the line took a level of commitment that most racers didn't have.

First thing I did when I left the course was jack up the heat... then I stopped at the Everyday Cafe and ran my hands under hot water for a few minutes, then got a huge hot chocolate. Bet you most people did something similar. I may never be warm again.

And Glenda Craddock... you rock. You were so awsome out there and I was very, very proud of you. No way I could have kept up with you in the slop today. Gold star, girl. Big gold star.

Adventures with Karen & Gina, or why I will never stay at Motel 6 again...

2009-12-02T20:40:00.003-05:00

Ok, I don't need much in a hotel. It has to be clean. It has to be safe. It can't have bugs. Just like with bike equipment pick 2 out of 3. Clean and safe, Safe and Bug free, etc...

Gina is my dog George's handler. We went on a typical Karen adventure to the Brittany Nationals in Ft Smith, Arkansas... yeah, on the Oklahoma border. Gina got to my house at 9:30 pm, and we drove straight thru, taking turns sleeping and walking dogs.

Thursday at 4 pm we arrived. Beat. We set up our equipment at the dog show site and headed to Cracker Barrel for a kick ass $8.99 turkey day dinner. Turkey, ham, veggies, stuffing, a drink and PIE! I may never cook again.

And then things got bad. Saturday night, after showing all day, we got back to Motel 6 about 1o pm. There were motocross racers in the parking lot getting a bit too wild. Two single women, 9 dogs, and a bunch of very drunk, and drugged up guys... It was not good. Then really not good.

At 10:30 they started beating on the van to make the dogs bark. Gina went out to see what was going on and one of the drunk slobs yelled at her..."What are you looking at, bitch!" They then told us that they could drink in public, they could do whatever they wanted and that I could get my liberal friends out and they'd shoot them...

So we called the front desk. The guys were not just harassing us, scaring the dogs, but also breaking glass everywhere... front desk said that they'd send a security guard...

Ten minutes later... no security guard so I called again. Finally an elderly man came, and when the guys told him that they didnt have to go in their rooms and that they'd get out a gun and start shooting people, he told us that we all should get along. Then he left. Fast.

So being dumb, I called the front desk again, and asked them to call the police. They told me they would. Not. Yeah, not.

So we sat up all night... afraid to pack up to leave as we would have to exit thru the very drugged up people. And the hotel did NOTHING to protect us.

At 5 am I went to the front desk to file a formal complaint. The receptionist looked at me like I was stupid. I guess that kind of behaviour is to be expected at Motel 6. We had planned on staying one more night before heading home, but I drove past Memphis, and got a little no-tell motel somewhere between Memphis and Knoxville.... it was quiet, it was clean, and no bugs.

Me, I'm never staying at Motel 6 again. They don't give a rats ass about their guests.

But George... made it to the very last cut at the Nationals... so close. I was so proud of him and Gina. The motel may have sucked... but Gina and George rocked the house.

Everyday is precious

2009-11-09T18:54:00.002-05:00

Every once in awhile something happens to make you do a reassessment. On Saturday, my Bobdog started limping and couldn't put his left hind foot down. Sunday, it was worse. It wasn't broken, and I was convinced he had torn his ACL.

Ok, ACL surgery in a dog is about $2500... you suck it up for your buds.

So I asked Cliff to take him to the vets for me as I am swamped at work.

ACL? Heck no. The vet called me and asked me about Bob's prior surgery on that left leg. No clue. Bob was a rescue dog, and many of you have been charmed by Bobtricks during the cool weather races. Pins and plates? That was a new one for me....

Of course, that wasn't the problem. Seems that Bob has been over using his left leg to compensate for the problem in his right leg. And the over use irritated those pins and plates in the left leg. What was wrong in the right leg... yeah, the BIG C. No, the really big C. As in Bone Cancer. Bone Cancer as in if you can you amputate the limb for pain control, not a cure. Bone Cancer as in 2 months maybe before the pain gets so bad...

So now I'm working on pain management schedules. The idea of a life without Bobwaddle... Bob running thru every trick in the repertoire until he gets the one that gets the treat... Bob that makes everyone smile...

Yeah, pain management. Every day is precious.

Why yes I can find that date...

2009-11-08T13:39:00.002-05:00

It's funny the little uses a blog has. Here is my latest use for a blog... a way to track when dogs try to bite me! No kidding!

I went out on the bike. Its friggin' beautiful outside, and about 70+ degrees. Amazing. I was having a great time, doing my usual winter alone ride.

And then...

See over a year ago I was repeatedly getting chased by this lab/border collie type dog. Then the dog started lying in wait for me, and there were several instances where I had close calls with cars trying hard not to get bit by "Blackie."

One day it got to be too much, and I saw someone up at the house and turned around and rode up the driveway and then used my bike as a matador's cape to keep the dog from biting me. I handle dogs. Don't try this at home.

The owner was obviously well to do and quite openly told me that she KNEW that the dog was going after cyclists. It wasn't until after I explained gross negligence, punitive damages and the like that she took more than a passing interest. All this time said dog was doing its darnedest to bite me.

They promised to keep the dog out of the road. And for about 6 months it worked.

Last April 25th the dog almost got me and I called animal control. How do I know, because I came home and wrote about it in the blog. I just looked up the date to give to animal control this time. Seems they have a new computer system, and wouldn't have the logs from the spring.

This info will at least help them determine if the officer who went out in the spring did his job and gave the owners a warning, if he did, they can file criminal charges against the owners. If he didn't... they have to give the owners a warning and then the NEXT time they can file criminal charges. What cant they do? They cant have the dog listed as a dangerous dog because so far my sprinting skills have saved me from actually getting bit.

I'd just as soon not get bit, thank you.

So just a word to the wise... if you are on Hanover Rd, just down from Pinhook in Goochland on the great bike way... watch out for "Blackie" at Windy Hill. But if you do get bit...

Sleepy Saturdays

2009-10-24T16:20:00.002-04:00

The great thing for today was getting a disc of photos in the mail. Thats George winning the first of two groups last week. Damn, he looks good. Photos are fun.

Me, I got on the bike and about a mile into the ride, it started to rain. I thought about going back, but then decided that it was a warm rain, and I needed the ride. It ended up being a great ride, all the way up until I flatted with 2 miles to go.

I thought about just walking home, but the other thing about the ride was that I saw a tremendous amount of snakes out for their final hurrah of the year. Snakes, including water moccasins. Since the roads out here are too narrow to walk on, and I'd have to walk in the grass. Not happening with all snakes, so I called for the sag wagon.

The rest of the day... will be spent cleaning the bike. And maybe a nap!

Meet the new foster kid... Casey

2009-10-14T08:06:00.003-04:00

Say hey to Casey, just a little tacker, at 4 months old. His owners were very nice people, who like a lot of people, didn't do research before buying a puppy. Brittany puppies are ACTIVE. As a hunting breed that is bred to cover large swaths of land to find birds, you really can't expect to have the just lay on the couch and be invisible.

Ok, you can expect it, but it ain't gonna happen.

I met his family in Fredericksburg, and soon we were off down the road. This puppy rings a bell to go outside. No kidding. At four months. The whole time we were talking, he sat in my lap very quietly. Hyper? Not on your life.

So Casey will be living at Camp Runamuck for the next few weeks until I find him the right home. I'll be getting him neutered, and I'm sure that my dogs will be teaching him all kinds of bad behaviors in no short order.

These two guys are Tom and Jerry... two Brittany brothers that were dumped in Atlanta. Brittany Rescue has a huge network, and a boarding kennel owner is fostering them right now. She says that they are two of the nicest Brittanys she's ever seen. Small, HAPPY, and just damn glad to be with you.

Got a lot of love in your heart? How about adopting Tom and Jerry together. They're like Double Mint Gum... double the pleasure, double the fun.

And sometimes you just go splat...

2009-10-11T14:57:00.004-04:00

Today Cliff and I rode up to DC to do the Women Have a Heart 5 mile tt in DC. Yeah, we were wait listed, but guaranteed to ride. Maybe. Kinda sorta. Not. After having to dog jog all over DC to get to the Verizon Center, we finally made it only to be told that we would not be able to ride. And then, maybe we could ride. I was afraid of this. After driving 2.5 hours to get there, I didn't want to just go home though.

Plus I had already given the parking garage guys a show. Hey, you drive 2.5 hours, with the rest stops closed... Cliff kept telling me that it was fine, fine, then HURRY UP! When you gotta pee, you gotta pee. Sorry, that's the way it is.

So we went out and rode with the family ride on completely closed streets (completely closed except for people walking blind...) How cool is it to ride in your nation's capitol, in front of the capitol!! Seriously cool.

And then they let me ride. But Cliff couldn't ride. Ok, just one more nail in the coffin.

And then I looked at the wonderful start house that was built for this event... and thought, oh, this will be bad. Guaranteed someone is going to crash off that puppy. High, with a steep and narrow ramp. Oh, yeah. Someone is going down.

Poor guy in front of me... I was watching him in the house and he was kinda sorta really sideways as he was being held. I knew it was going to happen... and it did. He went off, somersaulted and did a facer. Oh, you know that hurt.

And then it was my turn. And yep, I went off, went off... tried to save it, but knew it was a lost cause, and somersaulted and managed to do a good tuck and roll. I understand from the spectators that it was a gnarly thing to watch. Film at 11...

Wouldn't you know, that my handlebars were bent down, and I couldn't jerk them up, so the officials said that they would give me a re-start. Then I was told that I couldn't re-start, and then I was told that I could. This as the paramedics were trying to convince me to go to the hospital.

So I did restart. From the ground. And I didn't use a holder. It was an awsome thing to ride a tt in downtown DC.

So Mimi, you are not the only one to cartwheel off a start house. I now have joined your illustrious company. And now I get to go see if I can get some of the grime off in the tub. If you are hearing a terrible shrieking noise... its probably me.

Cool event, but I now remember that I completely hate DC. Traffic is bad, scenery is great, and I always find a way to go boom.

The wholecheck experience

2009-09-30T17:32:00.002-04:00

Whole Foods opened up here earlier in the year. Ok, its pricey, but if you need good stuff, you know that you can get it there, no muss, no fuss.

Plus they have that neat Enoteca wine bar... I really like the idea of trying with a decent enough size sample before I buy.

My Dad came to visit last week and Cliff and I took him to dinner on Friday. Being the ultimate cheapskate, we took him to Wholecheck. Why? Because on Fridays, the one near me does 5 for $5. Except its not 5 its 10... 5 nice size food samples and 5 1/4 glasses of wine for $5, and if you bring the wine glass back, the next time its $4. Yeah, $4.00. Ok, its not 5 food samples, either. They do food samples all over the store, and I swear we ate about a pound of really killer cheese, too.

Dad is in his 70's and does a great job cooking and stuff, but that food bar, and the $4.00 dinner, he was impressed. I think I have a new convert.

So did we buy anything else from Wholecheck? Hell no. Stuffed, we drove across the street to get stuff to cook for Saturday dinner. Sure couldn't beat that $4.00 check though...

The Intervention

2009-09-19T14:24:00.002-04:00

I have my self contained survival unit, aka "the Queencab." It's great. It is completely supplied in case of nuclear war, alien invasion, or group ride. However, every once in awhile, the interior gets to a toxic overload level.

And my team does an intervention.

I get back from a team business meeting which resulted in my missing the team ride this morning. As soon as I get home, J pulls up in the driveway, hands me her keys and steals my truck. She has promised to return it to me Monday morning.

Ok. I understand. I've hit the tipping point.

So I humbly thanked her and went to go get dressed to go for a ride.

Only problem... my self contained survival unit is gone, and J's dinky ass little car has an ancient pump with the wrong valve thingie on it.

So my ride is tanked.

See, I'm right, and they are wrong. You really DO need all that stuff that is in my truck.

Big sigh.

To test or not to test...

2009-09-15T13:00:00.002-04:00

There is a raging debate going on over at Slowtwitch.com right now. Seems that if you get a Kona slot as an age grouper that you will now have to sign a waiver, and be subject to out of and in competition testing just like the pros. (And since apparently the governing body has never seen fit to look into TUE's for age groupers, you can imagine some of the teeth gnashing that is causing...)

Me, I think its a great thing. I think everyone who competes should be tested at some point in time. I remember one year at the Pittsburgh Marathon, a local high school coach placed in the money and was tested. And failed. He let out a cry that he shouldn't be subjected to the testing that the pros go thru, since he wasn't a pro. (and I think he may have lost his coaching position...)

I also remember a little ethnic running enclave from the DC area who used to pop out to races that had money but no drug testing. As they didn't live in their home country, they were not subject to out of competition testing, and since they didn't do races here that did drug testing, they weren't subject to in competition testing. It was quite a little scam, but there wasn't much anyone was going to do about it. Drug testing is expensive.

One of my friends had an agent whose husband was eventually busted... Oh, the stories she would tell from some of the houses she stayed in. Drugs being sterilized on the stove...

But if you think that age groupers don't dope, you are in Lala Land. One of my former co-workers was on a pub team softball team... He told me what he took. And I told him that his balls were going to shrink to the size of marbles...

Do I think age groupers should be tested. Yep. People put too much time and effort to have some crappy cheater take away what they rightly earned. I don't agree with the whole rules apply to some people and not others. Its wrong. If you test positive, the results should be public, your peers should know. JMHO... what do you think?

The portable survival kit

2009-09-04T12:55:00.002-04:00

Welcome to the Labor Day weekend. As usual, I'm one of the only ones actually working today. Well, me and J. Sharon is getting her truck fixed, but never fear, she has both a laptop and a crackberry. The crackberry to send thousands of emails, and the laptop to play Mafia Wars. The only problem, is that Sharon's new bike is ready, and she is still stuck getting her truck fixed. Oh, second problem, her new bike is ready, she is still stuck getting her truck fixed and she is HUNGRY.

Now if she drove a self-contained survival unit like I do, she would be fine. I have a Toyota Queen Cab. It is built to hold one person. In a pinch, one person and four dogs, (one Doberman in the back and 1 Brittany and 2 black fluffy things in the passenger seat.) In the survival unit there is at least one bike, a pump, 3 pairs of bike shoes, crocs, 2-3 helmets, 6-10 pairs of gloves- none of which match, socks in all states of disrepair, a blanket or three, medical kits (notice the s), books, Wine Spectator in case I'm really thirsty, a camera in case there is something cool or you hit me, a bike trainer, a trainer mat, gas container *full*, money, and enough food and drinks to last a small family turned over in a ditch for a month.

When aliens hit the planet, and we have to flee into the hills... you will all be sorry. Me and my survival kit are packed and ready to go. Too bad there is no room for you!

GamJams Review- New Favorite Helmet

2009-09-01T09:09:00.004-04:00

If I had to pick one bike related THING this year that I really need, want and cant ride without, it would be the Specialized Sworks Helmet.

Specialized isn't even our sponsor this year, and this is still the helmet that I want on my head. It has a great locking system, that is easily adjustable. This is a good feature as I go from hair, to my every 3 year near crew cut and back. Believe it or not, hair has volume. I need a helmet that breathes, that is durable, and that you can clean up a bit. I really don't like helmets that hold that wonderful funk smell. My dogs do, but they don't wear helmets.

I'm sure that next year this will be my new favorite helmet. I can't wait until it gets here. Even as a favorite though, I doubt I'll be wearing it much and will still need that go-to helmet, the Specialized one.

Of course, my next favorite new "thing" this year is my new teammate, Pam. I've already got Thing One, and I've got Thing Two. Pam is going to have to be my favorite Thing Three. She sure is our favorite little pocket rocket, and we predict that she will be Kevin Dillard's new favorite subject, you know, after Eurotrash J.

Go Bernard Lagat!

2009-08-23T14:36:00.002-04:00

It's funny... America is the land of immigrants, but in track and field, this guy gets no love. He came to America to go to college and has lived here ever since. In every interview, he is the classiest guy who ever spoke. He praises his teammates, congratulates all around him, and thanks his country, USA.

Today's 5000 meters... what a fabulous race. Usually the Kenyans box him in to punish him for changing citizenship. Today, running with stitches in his legs from being spiked, he just positioned himself correctly and the sea parted. Stride for stride with Bekele... two great champions heading to the line, I was riveted.

Bernard Lagat, class act, and American. You cant always win, but you can put forth the best effort to try. And immediately afterward, he went to hug his teammates.

Thing 2 is a 3!!

2009-08-18T09:07:00.002-04:00

We met Sharon a year or so ago at one of the Speedway races. All alone, in her Army kit, looking like a lost puppy. You wouldnt think that that face hides a killer instinct, but you'd be wrong.

Now that's the face we know and love. The take no prisoners, ride until you barf on your competition, and if you cant throw up on them, burp on them.

So congratualations! Colsweatsalot, aka Burpsalot Kitty, or Thing 2, has now been upgraded to a 3! With lots and lots of hard work, and a ride 'til you puke approach and good things do come!

How hot is it?

2009-08-17T14:12:00.006-04:00

I get stopped on the road to help out strangers all the time. I bet you do, too. Yeah, I've shared my water with perfect strangers, but they usually are taller than my knee.

What happens when it''s 120 degrees in Australia? Koala's beg for water.

You wouldn't turn down a mate would ya?

Trying to keep cool- Reivew of the Aspen Cool Collar

2009-08-11T15:35:00.002-04:00

Some things you just know work. That's my Brittany, George... about to go into the show ring on a stinkin' hot day. What's that pretty blue blanket on him? That's a cool blanket. You soak it in ice water, which these crystals in the blanket suck up and it acts like a portable air conditioner.

I dont say it works. George says it works. George LOVES his cool blanket...

So when I got offered the chance to try out the Aspen Cool Collar, I was all over it. I'm a tough reviewer, but I pretty much already was sold on the concept.

Why? Well, because of George. Then because of Deena Drossin. Deena is a hero of mine. In case you don't know who she is, she is the chick who currently holds the US record in the marathon, and took the bronze medal at the Athens Olympics. When everyone else was out warming up, Deena had on an ice vest. And when the race really mattered, Deena was flying.

Then you have the Garmin guys with ice socks down their backs. I do something similar with a Camelbak at tt's. A little fluid, lots of ice. Its initially a pretty shocking thing, but anything you can do to keep your core cool, is good.

So how do the Cool Collars work? Pretty good with a few tweeks. This is one size fits all, so unless you have a huge neck, it will be loose. That's not so bad, on a hot day you don't want anything strangling you. Other than that, it works. Put it on, it cools you down. Put it back in the ice chest to cool it down again and it works again.

The instructions that come with it are a bit skimpy, so here is a Karen Cool Collar 101:

1. it looks very thin. When you soak it for a half hour, it plumps up like a sausage. That's what it should look like.

2. put it in your cooler or frig. You want it cold.

3. when it cools down, give it a quick soak in ice water to refresh it.

4. You can use it while riding, but I think it dries out in the wind and then becomes a bit irritating. Its better to keep you cool before riding, and to cool you off when you get off the bike.

Would I buy one... yep. Its been stinkin' hot and I've used it almost every day. George approves. Could it be better? Yes, but not at $15.00. Cheap is GOOD.

How do you get one? http://www.theaspencoolcollar.vpweb.com

Fighting the good fight

2009-08-06T08:35:00.002-04:00

I have "issues" with dying. Not really being dead, but the whole indignity and suffering that sometimes goes along with the process of dying. What my Mom went thru, I would never have put my dogs thru. I sure as all get out don't want to go thru it myself. Modern medicine may be wonderful, but it sure does have some pitfalls.

Every once in awhile though, someone's process and acts of selflessness inspire others to do really great things. Thousands and thousands of people have followed Susan and Elden's struggles with cancer. From the desire to do something good, Fatcyclist raised over $500,000 for the battle against cancer.

Susan fought hard, and is now at rest. The fight goes on, and if you have some $$ to spare, you might even win a really sweet new Orbea. So head over to www.fatcyclist.com. Buy lots of chances to win, and help Fatty defeat cancer.

Gam Jams Sock Review

2009-08-04T10:42:00.002-04:00

I love socks. Unfortunately, so does my dog Bob. Bob loves stinky socks, and follows me around when I get back from a ride to get HIS socks. He doesn't chew them up, he just carries them, and lays with them in his face so that he can breathe in the wonderful odors.

He is a seriously warped little dog.

My favorite socks... Sock Guy. They actually fit my feet, and every now and again I get them on sale. As many people have noticed... when the sock fairies take a sock back to never never land, I end up with mis-matched socks. Ergo the Hottie-Bitch combo. I do have to be careful not to mix and match lions and zebras, ala Garanimals. It is a rare day that I am ever color coordinated.
What do I wear most? Decente Socks. Why? Because Probikekit had an awesome sale, they were like $3.00 and buy one get one free. Oh, and free shipping. I think I bought 30 pairs of them. Now I'm sure to have a match, even if they don't actually match any of my bike kits. They do the job, they last ok, they fit pretty good, and Bob's happy, they still stink.

In the winter, I found a few pairs of long Cannondale wool socks on a clearance table. Man, they are some kind of wonderful. They are thin enough to wear under bike shoes, and warm enough and breathe enough to wear when its cold. They wick sweat away very well, which is super important for when I have booties on. Did I mention they were on sale? I would buy those socks full price. You know, if I had to. They also pass the Bob test, which Bob thinks is MOST important.

Socks I hate... Defeet... Not only are they very overpriced, but the women's sizes are off, and within a few wears my toes poke holes in them. Any sock that doesn't last is not worth it. Expensive socks that don't last... just not right.

In the summertime, I only wear short cuffs. Why? Because I try to draw the line (forgive the pun) at the number of tan lines that decorate my body. Its bad enough that I have a farmer's tan, then the bike short lines, and the watch lines. High water marks on the calves are just bad.

Next winter though, baby I want a couple pairs of Gamjams socks.

A charming Encounter... NOT

2009-08-01T11:35:00.002-04:00

I am a very blessed person. I remind myself all the time, just in case I get too big for my britches. You never know when the rug will get pulled out from underneath you, so you better count your blessings when you can.

One of the biggest of my blessings is that I live in a rural county, with mostly gracious people. Some are incredibly wealthy. Some are incredibly poor. For the most part, the people where I live, rich or poor, are just plain, good people.

When you City folks are getting honked at, screamed at, and run over by people in a hurry who are texting something wildly important... I generally get waived at. On the rare occasion that I get a flat, chances are good that I'll have a few people stop and offer to help me out. Chances are that those people will know Cliff or be related to him. I swear he is related to everyone out here.

Yeah, I get the occasional car that passes too close. I believe its accidental, and almost never on purpose. Truck mirrors hang out a bit farther than most people think. Occasionally I'll amost get taken out by a trailer... same thing. They are longer than most people think.

Today I'm out on an easy ride to loosen up the legs before tomorrow's tt. Just an easy spin, on a very quiet road, beside some of the most expensive real estate in the county. Horses, dogs, deer... my favorite road. 150' before I make a left hand turn and I'm in the left hand lane. And suddenly I have a car about 2" off my rear wheel. Revving his motor... Very angry.

Unlike most cars, my bike does have a turn signal... I'm on the double yellow line, with my arm out indicating that I'm turning left, and this guy is trying to pass me. As I turned left, he yelled at me, "Stupid bitch, get on the fucking bike path!"

Uh, I must have missed something. In Goochland we don't have bike paths, bike lanes, and now that I think of it, a good many of our roads aren't even striped.

No, I didn't waive at him, ring a bell at him, and unfortunately did not get his tag number.

Cliff called me and I told him. He asked me if I would recognize the guy again or if I could give him a better description of the car. No, I can't. And no, I don't really want to know who this person is. And yes, I bet it would be easy for Cliff to find out.

Couldn't you just see it... being introduced to this guy at some event and knowing that he is the jerk that was screaming at me. Couldn't you just picture it... as I'm shaking his hand in front of his family... " Oh, yes! But we have met before! Allow me to refresh your memory of a lovely summer day when you so robustly told me " Stupid bitch, get on the fucking bike path!" And what would I say to the wife? "Oh, you must be soooo proud to have such a fine example of manhood for your own..."

Nope, think I'll pass on figuring out who our hero is. My mouth gets me in enough trouble as it is.

Fungus Factories

2009-07-31T08:50:00.002-04:00

Ok, I admit it... I have a phobia. It's not spiders, or bug, or easy things like that. I actually think spiders are pretty cool. I have a fungus phobia.

Yeah, fungus. I am terrified of your slimy ass water bottles that rot in the back of your car, but you continue to drink out of. Ewwwwwwwwwww. I see you, with black floaty stuff swimming around in your bottles, and I get the cold clammies.

The worst? Gatorfunk bottles. Yeah, you know what I'm talking about. All those germies and fungi just living the life of Riley in your bottle after you have continuously bathed them all summer in sugary sweetness. Uh, wash your bottle every now and again? Paleeeeze?

Maybe even worse, camelbaks. I've started using a camelbak bladder for time trials and I live in fear of the little assassins that are hiding in the tubing ready to smack me into the er with some variant of Dengue fever, gut rot, or some other esoteric crud.

When J and I did Bike VA a few years ago we were some of the few souls that escaped the food poisoning epidemic. I told J... no eating out of community bowls, no eating food that wasn't wrapped... and no drinking from anyone's water. We carried our own wash stuff, and we hit convenience stores where we could. (and almost died out there in WVA when the century day was MUCH longer than 100 miles and we bypassed a questionable looking stop only to run out of food and water when there was nothing to be had on the route...) But we didn't get sick, didn't go to the er, and felt pretty smug later.

So help me. Wash your bottles. Like all the time. If they have floaties in them... throw the bottles AWAY. EEEEEEeeeeewwwwww. I get the willies just thinking about it.

Bullshit Bingo

2009-07-24T10:56:00.002-04:00

Yesterday my boss got a motivation catalog... go to www.baudville.com. I thought I was going to die of laughter. It was full of "Successories" unbelievably stupid things to give to employees, in lieu of money, to show them that you really appreciate and value them and all the overtime they work. My favorite...this little card that tells them what great job they did, with a removable button so that everyone in the office could instantly tell that they're special.

I was laughing so hard that I almost fell off my ball. My boss did NOT think it was funny.

And then of course I had to waste more time by emailing that stuff to all my friends. And my buddy, Swinging Balls Battle sent me this back...

"Boy this was timely. We spent 3.5 hours discussing diversity and inclusion today. Specifically hot they related to the workplace in terms of missing opportunities. I'm all for that. But the new buzzword is 'engagement.'

Anyone remember "Bullshit Bingo"? Often called 'Buzzword Bingo?" You have a list of words that you take to a meeting. You mark them off as they're used. First one to complete a line stands up and shouts, "Bullshit!" Other than being a career limiting move, it's pretty damn funny. Anyway, I found my old sheet for this. Cool words. Remember 'empowerment?' How about 'paradigm?'

Sure you do! Play it with me now... 'engagement', 'inclusion', 'divirsity'. Bullshit! See, wasn't that fun!"

Yes, you too can have fun at work. Add in continuous improvement, and other words and play along.

I'm so glad that my friends are as warped as I am. Happy Friday!

Time to burn in hell

2009-07-23T09:15:00.003-04:00

Last night was the chicks ride, with the addition of our honorary chicklets... Bill an Cliff.

Carolyn, Cliff and I were motoring after coming up a nice hill, and as we slowed to take a breath... Cliff spied puppies in the woods. At first we thought there were two puppies... then we found two more.

Too bad they were so skittish... I couldn't get them to come to me. But, I can tell you, they LOVE Natures Path Peanut Butter bars. (I do, too!) So we fed them all we had, and called animal control to bring out the traps. Maybe we'll have luck today and get the little guys someplace where they wont get smooshed by a car or eaten by coyotes.

Yes, we have coyotes. And yes, they will eat puppies. Cats as well. One of the DNR guys told me a few years ago that Louisa Counties feral cat problem had "resolved." As in... eaten. Coyotes think cats are quite tasty.

So to the people who throw puppies out to die... there is a place for you. Its nice and warm.

Seat bag review- just the nutz

2009-07-21T10:32:00.002-04:00

At our Sprint into Spring race this year, my teammate Bill Battle forgot to take off his seat bag. I promised him that I would torment him for the rest of his life about it, and I always live up to my promises....

The bag was not well attached to the bike, and swung back and forth... kind of in a mesmerizing way... that brought to mind a set of, you know, testicles. I had to bring his significant other over to take a look, and Carolyn immediately went into hysterical laughter as the bag (balls) swung back and forth, back and forth.

So now, whenever I think of bike bags, that's the first thing that pops into my mind... a set of brass ones, swinging wildly.

In general, I don't use a bike bag. That's what jersey pockets are for. I do have one, a cheap Performance brand monstrosity that I can carry a small family in. I only use that for really long rides where stores are few. If I need something, I've taken one tip from the tri-geeks, and use a Bento Box on the top tube. Trust me, if I want a gel, or a chapstick, or fresh gum... I want it where I can grab it. The Bento box sits on the top tube and is much more accessible than any bike bag.

Now close your eyes and think of Bill Battle... you see swinging testicles now don't you...

Trinity of Terror

2009-07-20T10:20:00.003-04:00

Thats what Hany called us at Roanoke... but J and I were thinking... maybe we need cute names like the Vanderkitten girls. You know, like "Mitten Kitten." Then maybe guys will buy us stuff, and think we're cute and all that stuff.

So here we go, the new names for the Trinity of Terror...

Burpsalot Kitten

Rabid Spitty Kitty

Snotty Kitty

Think it will sell?

Rats its gnats redux

2009-07-13T21:10:00.002-04:00

Welcome to the Ides of July... or Gnat Season.

Now if you are NOT a dedicated mouth breather like me, gnat season is probably not a big thing. But for the septum deranged like me, gnat season means an extra source of protein on every ride. At least for the month of July...

To make matters worse, I chew gum. Yeah, eeeeewwwwwww....

Got Skilz?

2009-07-10T10:10:00.003-04:00

Craig Dodson at the ID3 crits, courtesy of Hany Hosny

I had one of my usually weekly chats with Carolyn Goble yesterday and we were talking about one of my new proteges, Pam Webb. Pam is a killer find, beautiful, talented, and a soon to be rock star on the bike. What does Pam lack? Skills. But she is a perfect student, she really wants to learn, and you can see her sharp little mind just spinning as we discuss things.

I love Pam and I cant wait for her to kick my ass. It will be soon, I assure you.

What was mind blowing was Carolyn's comments about the training that RABA, Team Natures Path, and Craig Dodson of Richmond Pro set up to help RABA with the serious increase in bad crashes they were having on group rides. TNP set it up, and Craig came and gave a great skills class.

Problem was, few people came, and those people who did, were not the problem children.

When Carolyn asked people why they didn't come, they generally told her that they didn't need skills training, they knew everything!

I was floored. I told Carolyn that its a rare pro who doesn't continue to work on their skills. I go out and do skills training all the time! I can't think of ANYONE who couldn't use even better skills.

Trust me, I've been on RABA rides where I have been scared to death by how people ride. I told Carolyn that its rare that I get scared in a race, it happens, but on a group ride, especially with strong people with no skills, it happens all the time.

So thanks Craig for teaching the class. Lets hope next time more people show up, and actually learn something. It sure would make the roads a bit safer!

Computer review

2009-07-08T20:10:00.002-04:00

I admit to being a bit of a Luddite... I'm about 10 years behind everyone else, and if anything technologically goes bad... I start searching for a 12 year old.

On my tt bike, I was perfectly happy with any computer that showed speed, average and time. Except that I typically use a Hed Trispoke up front, and while carpet tape USUALLY holds a computer magnet... on 3 race occasions, it didn't.

Funny thing, that. What is really grand is that on the days that I didn't have a computer, I rode about the same speed as I would ride with one, and once rode faster. Much faster. (I think it has something to do with all the predict your mile time stuff I did when I was a runner...)

To solve the computer thing, I bought a Garmin 305 for the tt bike. Problem, you have to charge it for pretty much every ride. Since the Garmin has to be charged, I have left it at home, on the charger, when it should have been on the bike at a race. That's strike one. Strike two is that the little computer really likes to have its data downloaded into your PC. Except that I'm a Luddite, and I just don't do that.

Garmin has replaced my 305. Multiple times. Those guys at Garmin are just wonderful. I'm still not going to down load the data, and the 305 will continue to lock up after a few hundred rides. And I'm sure the nice guys at Garmin will continue to replace it.

I finally got tired of charging a computer for the road bike, and just got a cheap Cat Eye Strada. Know what I hate... those little arrows that tell you that you are going faster than your average, or slower than the average. I have to turn that sucker over when I go out for an easy ride, as my competitive nature makes me want to keep that arrow pointing up.

What do I need in a computer... average speed, time, distance and current speed. I do miss an old Specialized computer that I had years ago... it told you the current temp. Like you really needed a computer to tell you that it was stinking hot, when you could look down and see the tar bubbling on the road. I may not be a sophisticated geek, but I am a geek. I loved knowing that it was really 115 degrees on the road... you know, where we ride. Too bad I knocked that sucker off the handlebar one day and we could never find it.

The weekend in pictures

2009-07-07T14:10:00.002-04:00

Every once in awhile you need to race in the rain. Rain has this way of making you humble... as you take a technical corner and then all of a sudden your rear wheel slides, and you are kissing pavement. Col. Sweatsalot ate it on the first corner, the site of many a bangemup all day. Notice the little kisses on her knee...

But J, who swears that she isn't the best in corners, went thru all day, with nary a slip or slide. J is, as always, our saving grace. She towed Sharon back up to the pack after she was able to get to the pit for her free lap.

I missed my pedal in the rain, don't you hate it when that happens, and slowed to see if Sharon was ok, only to miss my only hope of ever making it back to the field. So I rode most of the day all by my lonesome, except for the one lap that I was able to hook a ride with J and Emily Joyner... just as our group got a prime lap. That was the last I saw J. I was finally able to hook up with a Velobella girl, right before the end.

You know, it can get very lonely out there... J giving Sharon the limo treatment...

All in all it was a great weekend. Maybe not the most successful weekend that we've had, but the racing was hot, Roanoke as always was wonderful, and the people were grand. I may eventually get my bike back from the shop, sooner or later!

Stratton's Keirin Culture shop was fun, and we had a blast at his beer bash. The restaurant recommendation to Issac's was good too. All 4 of us ate for about $40. Saturday we hit the Blue Star with Ruth Stornetta and had a great dinner on the patio. We talked to the masses every day. Bike racing is a welcome sport in Roanoke.

If you'd like to see more of how the weekend went, head over to our buddy Hany's website and take a peek. And no, those are not photo shopped pictures... Hany just does great work. go to www.hanyhosnyphotography.com I understand that if you buy photos soon, he'll give you a discount. So don't be cheap, show a brother some love.

Hany is trying to hook me up with the fountain of youth... www.capoeirava.com I'm thinking of giving them a try. I may have to quit my job first though. So if you have any spare cash laying around after buying a few hundred of Hany's photos... send it my way. As flat footed as I am, I may have to live at the studio to learn how to MOVE again!

Killer Bee and the Twins

2009-07-05T08:11:00.003-04:00

Have you ever stopped to talk to spectators at a race?

We were walking back down to the race to watch the 1-3 men after we raced. We got to the downhill corner, and were stopped by a couple who were watching the race with a whole lot of enthusiasm. What did they want to know? They wanted to know if it was ok to cheer for the riders, because they really enjoyed the race, but didn't want to break any one's concentration... 'cause they looked so intense...

At which point J started screaming at the guys so loud that the lady was startled (and I think maybe peed herself, you know, just a little.) We told them that yeah, it was cool to scream their appreciation, and that the riders DO hear it, and it helps when you are deep in the land of pain.

At that point, the lady told us that they were rooting for the Killer Bee and the Twins! And here they came! They had no concept of teams, and thought that the "Twins" must be brothers or something. Yeah, kind of... those were the Richmond Pro Guys, and the Killer Bee- was killing everyone... Ben King.

So then we got to explain how racing is like chess, with all kinds of strategy. They listened with rapt attention. They loved it.

And they said that they were going to come out to today's race. We'll see... its raining.

But that cat 1-3 men's race... was the best race in the state all year. Bar none.

We were peppered with questions from passers by when we were on the trainers. Questions when we were walking. Questions, questions, questions. We loved it. And we answered them all, no matter how long it took.

Roanoke- probably one of the best places to race you'll ever find... fabulous courses, great people, killer restaurants, and ... the Killer Bee and the Twins.

On the road again...

2009-07-03T13:38:00.002-04:00

Monday I zipped out from home to Kentucky for Masters Nats. I can end the suspense now, I did not win the tt...

But on the way I did manage to break out my handy dandy magic coupon book to score some good hotel deals. El Cheapo Delux here... not paying 130 or whatever it was to stay at the race headquarters. Especially when said race headquarters really didn't seem to offer anything to the racers. My newest find... Microtel. There was a coupon for every stop I made and I don't think I paid over $40 for a room. The rooms were pretty new, clean and quiet. I cant ask for much more than that.

I lived out of the cooler, funny how with free continental breakfast, and a cooler you can do that. I did stop at my other go to place though... Tamarac- the tourist trap in Beckley, WVA. The Greenbrier has a cafeteria there, and you can eat like a Queen for about $8. No kidding. Pan fried trout, fresh green beans and mushroom, roast potatoes. Yum.

After the race I went over to the Kentucky Horse Park to pal around with Cigar and Funnycide. I had a day to kill, and thought that I might as well do something fun. If you are ever in Lexington, its a well spent $15, and next year, they get the World Equestrian Games, the first time that they have ever been held outside of Europe.

Ok, the highlights of the race... getting to hang with all my friends who decided to come out and ride with the best of the best. Dennis, Tony, Marc & Marnie, Mimi.. yeah they were all there. Thank God that Tony had at least brought stuff as I ended up using his trainer. I'm not the only one... Dennis did, too. And Tony did TRY to give me a heads up on both the turn around and how short the course was. Too bad I really wasn't letting stuff sink in!

Tuesday I rode the course about 11:30 am. Yeah, during the high wind warning. Too say that there were points that I really thought I should get off my bike... understatement. And right there I decided to not use the tri-spoke and just use a regular wheel. With the wind, and the bridges over gorges... it was scary. So scary that I only rode the course one time, not the two that I had planned. And to be honest, I really wasn't paying attention to markings, I was trying to stay on the bike.

Tuesday night I went in to Louisville early to get my bike measured. I knew that it wouldn't pass, but was very confident of a morphological exemption. First ref, the not official measurer, agreed... I was about 1-2 cm off with the saddle. So I waited, but never fear, I had my shoes for the exemption.

Uh, next ref... said I was fine. So I made him measure the bike again. Nope, fine. I told him, that when I measured it it wasn't fine, when the other guy measured it, it wasn't fine. Nope, fine.

Now the Natures Pearl guys had to zip out to Lowes to buy a hacksaw for their handlebar extensions... I was worried for them.

Get to the race on Wed and the wind has died down, but there is a good chance for tstorms later in the day. Oh, and the race is delayed, rumor being that no one figured on the amount of traffic on the HIGHWAY that they were using. Oh, I'd be sooo embarrassed. Not nearly as embarrassed as if the other rumor I was hearing came to pass, that they were going to have to cancel the tt. Yeah, cancel the Masters National TT. Yeah, that would be bad.

But the race went off. And when it was my turn to go, the same ref who measured me twice the night before did not pass my bike. But yes, I did get the morph exemption, and then I rode like crap. 1000 miles, multiple days in hotels, and I stunk.

I did get to see Cigar the next day though.

So now we're in Roanoke, and the girls just got here for the Mill Mt Hill Climb tonight. If I didn't like the hills on the tt course, I'm really not going to like Mill Mt. I'll get up though, and maybe with the girlies around me I'll actually sleep tonight.

Onward and upward!

Raisin Hope at Reston

2009-06-24T09:16:00.002-04:00

A long time ago, in a land far, far away I once did head injury rehab. Really. When I graduated college, I wanted to do a few years of what I called "Peace Corps" work and went to work at Easter Seal in Baltimore retraining people with head injuries to go back to work, or re-learn how to function again.

Most of my clients... young people. And more than a few of them were injured in bike accidents.

So this is a subject that is near and dear to my heart.

If you get a chance, head on over to Gamjams.net --- http://www.gamjams.net/2009/06/10-questions-with-saul-raisin.html and read Mike's article on Saul Raisin and the Reston Race this weekend.

Every day that I went to work at Easter Seal I knew that I was making a difference in someone's life. The incredible advances that have happened since then... make me feel like I was working in the dark ages. So go ahead and take a peak, you might learn something, too!

Another One Bites the Dust

2009-06-21T15:45:00.002-04:00

I'm home. Semi-unpacked and about to hop in the tub to chill out with a good book and a bottle of wine.

Low lights of the State TT... 3 riders DQ'd for drafting... all of them juniors. Several more reports of other adults drafting, but unfortunately not in front of the officials that I had on the course. Deep sigh. Cheating is stealing, and it just sucks.

Oh, and there was the bad crash between Maria and Brenna... two great people. Maria has 30 stitches in her face and a broken tt bike... Brenna luckily escaped a bit better off. When I saw the riders down, my first thought was that sick feeling that it was two juniors and they must be dead. Not that having it be Maria and Brenna was better, but they weren't dead, and it wasn't a kid. Oh, geez. I bet my cortisol level is past the roof...

And then there is the driver who is going to sue me after a cyclist changed lanes and forced her off the road. Nice.

But this was probably our best run event. My team was everywhere, doing everything and I absolutely knew that I could still ride when Mark Pye took charge. Mark is THE MAN... and even painted a skull and cross bones in front of the bad way thru the bridge, and took the time to lay out with arrows the best way thru some pot holes. Many kisses... many.

And if you missed your start time... it wasn't because of the whip bitch. Julie was cracking the whip, getting everyone lined up. Those of you who were late... some of you 15 + minutes late... mirror time.

Mike, Christine, Steve, and Frank (who had just had spine surgery....) they rock. Big time. Again, everything that needed to be done... done.

Sharon and James, did the registration, and kept all the paperwork in line. And then some... Poor Sharon is in Texas, and still working on our tt.

Steve, Brent, Mark, Bill... kept all the cars as close together as possible... this is a small area.

And the turn around crew... Cliff, Scott, Steve and Jake. They kept everyone safe. These guys would have taken on a car, and did, to keep riders safe.

Paula and Dave... ran every errand and called numbers to the chief ref. All day. In the sun. And it was HOT.

There are more people... because there is always so much to do. Like Carolyn Goble who volunteer officiated... so that we could try to even the playing field against people drafting... to Gilbert, Danielle and Jessie who always do such an outstanding job. Mille grazie.

Oh, lets also thank Mother Nature... who gave us the glorious wind... which pushed riders to the breaking point. I know, my bike was airborne on several occasions. The Hed Trispoke was probably NOT the wise choice on a day with such wicked cross winds.

Thanks everyone for coming. And I hope that you like the prizes, from the Natures Path bars and bags, Contes gift cards, Wawa gift card, Chipotle (YUM!) cards, Fiorucci meat bags, and all the other swag. Much of which was donated by Julie... so if you got other swag, and if you got a junior swag bag, I bet you got stuff that Julie's fast little feet won for you. So say thanks to those who give so much back to our sport.

I'm going to go pass out now.

TNP State Sr. Crit

2009-06-20T19:30:00.003-04:00

Wow. What a cool course... I heard it all day. It snaked, it went up, it went down, and the 180...Wow. You missed it... you really missed something great. Natures Path, and Carolyn Goble and Dennis Ranier in particular get gold stars for putting on such a great first time race.

Maybe if we are all good, we'll get to do it again!

So how'd it work for me... Doo doo. The cat 4 women raced at 8 something this morning and Colsweatsalot was doing Army stuff at Ft Hood all week and got in at 12:30 last night. A wee case of food poisoning on top of it... and lets just say that the girls who sucked her wheel, got covered in something not nice as she barfed her way around the course. I sent her to Patient Worst to get an IV, which the nurse refused to give her since her heart rate was "normal." Uh, normal for a fat chain-smoker, but not normal for Sharon. Grrr....

Then the debate about what to do with the 4 entry 40+ womens field. Yeah, we wanted to combine the cat 1-3 race with it, but the chance of bad weather, and having this be the state championship... we didnt want the 1-3's to have to race 2 hours later. So the 40+ women raced later, with now 5 women.

The wind picked up. The wind gusted. And the first 90 degree turn with straw bales... I got blown sideways into a straw bale. I spent the next 3 laps turning myself inside out trying to catch back on in the wind before deciding that it wasnt worth killing myself... and I still averaged a faster ride than the 1-3 race. Go figure.

The good thing of the day... Julie smoked the 40+ race and won. See what happens when she doesnt have to drag my lazy ass around?

I'm back home, gonna hop in the tub and then finish up stuff for the state time trial. Want to really see carnage? I'm hearing a 35 mph wind out of the north-west tommorrow... which means a killer tailwind heading down 301, and a bitch of a head wind coming back. We'll be picking up bodies off the side of the road for days.

Good thing we start and stop at the rescue squad... huh?

TGIF

2009-06-19T07:15:00.003-04:00

Race registration for our TT closed at 6 pm. So I got out on the bike after zipping the info to James, so that I could get a ride in and relax.

Not.

Ring, ring, ring, ring... Help, I went to register and registration is CLOSED!!!

Yep, thats the funny thing. You put your info on bike reg 6 weeks in advance, and then send tons of reminder emails. Beg people to register. Tell them that when they play the EBAY game that bad things can happen... And still people are shocked when they go to register with 20 seconds to go, that bad things can happen.

How could anyone have thought of that!!!!

Nope, you are not getting in. Sorry, I feel for you. Really.

I got home and then spent the rest of the night stuffing packets. A little vino... Bravo tv, and a cat who thinks he should be a "prize." (no you cant have Fuzzy.)

Thank God its Friday. I'll have twenty emails begging this morning. The answer is no, but I do feel for you. Don't do it again. Enter early, make a girl's life easier.

Running over Mickey

2009-06-17T21:22:00.002-04:00

We save turtles, heck, we even save snakes... and once a tractor trailer went by us and blew an Indigo Bunting out of the sky and Cliff snagged it out of rushing traffic and held it until it regained consciousness and flew away...

Tonight, I saved my first mouse.

Cliff, J and I went out to West Creek to ride the Natures Path course and to pick up, and drop off race stuff. Of course as soon as we got there it started to rain. Thats ok, we ride in the rain. And then the phone calls about the race started and well... I might as well have stayed home. The joys of race promotion.

I finally decided that I really didn't want to loose yet another cell phone due to "moisture", so we headed back to the truck to ditch the phone. We went under one tree where a mother red tail hawk was trying to encourage junior to take the leap, and then went under a bridge where J and Cliff almost ran over a small brown lump in the road.

Being slow as shi* I got a better view of the lump. Said lump was a baby field mouse, cowering in the road, trying not to get smooshed by said instruments of death...

So I turned around and scooped up the little tacker... Cute beady little eyes... tiny little body with his heart beating a thousand beats a second. And then Cliff said, "Yuck, you touched it? Thats nasty! Eeeeewwwww." This from the man who has carried sick kittens for miles in his jersey.

Yeah, I touched him, and then put him in the woods. Cute little Mickey... soon to be snake food.

And then we went back to the truck and drank a bottle to celebrate the little sucker. Poor Mickey, he may end up snake food, but no bikes were going to run him over tonight.

The weekend so far...

2009-06-06T21:48:00.003-04:00

Ok, so the good things first... after my ride this morning, I zipped up to Waynesboro to watch Georgie show. He took a group 3, and I got to be there to watch. Then I got to go for a run with him. Happiness is getting to see my dog, watching him look so grand and happy, and just getting to snuggle a bit.

Then I found out that the kid who got run over and his head cut up at Ride Sally Ride... Jake King. I've said it before-Jake is the future of cycling. I'm going to be crippled up and I'll bore people to death with tales of how I knew Jake when he was a scrawny little kid, with a fierce pained look on his face as he demolished the junior fields. Heal quick Jake, you have racer's legs to rip off...

And then I read an email from Mike May... and I was flattered. Yeah, I'll do it, but it will be a secret until it comes out. Just that it was so timely, with the state tt in 3 weeks, and me going into my psycho-bitch phase that happens every year about this time as I make sure that everything and anything that needs to be done to make this a SAFE and FAIR race happens.

Life is good.

Thanks Matt

2009-06-01T19:31:00.003-04:00

If you've ever been to a race in the Richmond area and have had a crash, it was probably Matt who stitched you up. Matt who scrubbed you, consoled you, and laughed with you about how cyclists just seem to fall down, go boom.

He not only saves us when we race, but he saves me in real life.

Trust me to show up to the race on Sunday to cheer my girls on since I felt like crap. Matt of course asks me how I'm doing, and I tell him. Which results in him sending in orders for a ct scan the next day. I was sure that I had an ovarian cyst rupture, Matt wasnt so sure and was not about to let me go septic. So he told me not to come into the office, just to call and get the referral.

Then I spend the rest of the day volunteer officiating to help out, and watched Matt stitching and scrubbing torn up cyclists, all day.

Yeah, turns out that J's original diagnosis was right, but Matt was right to make me go get it checked out. And then Matt just called me, at 7pm, to let me know that once all the contrast dye and sludge stuff passes, that I'm good to go again. You know, as soon as I can move away from the bathroom...

So thanks Matt, for always taking care of us less than bright cyclists... its a tough job, but someone has to do it!

Hair today...

2009-05-21T21:02:00.004-04:00

So what do you do when you have a craptastic day at work...

I go torment poor Korean hair stylists.

It takes me a couple years to grow enough hair to donate. In the mean time I suffer thru having to wear a cap to bed because fine, Norwegian hair is NOT prone to getting long and you have to baby it. Oh, and you have to use massive amounts of really expensive conditioners, and forget about cutting it for years...

Ok, that part is not so bad. I seriously detest going to get my hair cut. And I really hate PAYING to get my hair cut. Although that part is probably cheaper than all the expensive conditioners it takes to get this kind of hair to grow...

And not to mention the fact that Cliff says that my hair makes his face itch...

So, after a few glasses of vino, I headed for the mall and did the walk up routine at a nice salon... "Um, do you have someone who can do a walk up?" Now, I knew full well who you get when you walk up. You get a young, right out of school stylist, who probably can't speak English. In this salon, she will be Korean. Which is fine with me, I've know lots of very talented Korean stylists, and Sharon will tell you, there are fabulous Korean tailors.

So I go back with this tiny Korean lady, and she painfully asks me what I need done. And I told her that I was going to donate my hair, and needed it all cut off...

"Scuze me?" said with a panicked look in her eyes...

So I told her again, that I was going to donate my hair, that we had to cut off at least 8", but the more we could snag, the better...

"Scuze me?" she said, looking like a snake had her by the throat and she was begging anyone within hearing to save her...

So I reached over, patted her hand and told her that I was not crazy, that I was cutting off all my hair and just wanted enough left that I didn't look Gay... not that there was anything wrong with being Gay, but that I really didn't want Gay hair...

At this point I thought she was going to faint.

So I picked up some bands and started to show her how to do it, and then had to keep moving the band closer to my head as she kept moving them out... in the end I looked like Pipi Longstocking, but with less freckles.

Now if I had had one more glass of vino, or if she had been American... after she whacked off that first pony tail, I would have let out a wail and cried out that I couldn't believe what she had done to me. But that would have been really mean. I did think about it though.

In the end, I had to talk her thru it, but I ended up with J hair. It looks fine. It will grow out. You know, in about 3 years.... But maybe, someone who needs it, will get a head of K hair... and her boyfriend won't tell her that it makes his face itch. Just maybe...

Centuries... Mafia Style

2009-05-16T16:48:00.002-04:00

I use century rides as either a great way to get in mega shape, or at the end of the year as a great way to wind down a race season. Like that Greg Lemond quote, they never get easier, you just get faster. At least sometimes they do.

Today we were given a great gift, a Mafia escort to mile 30 and change... Having Don Vito himself, Pave' Maria, Rat and little Frankie give us the plush puppy ride... priceless. Having Maria give us French lessons, classic. Merci Buckets.

Of course, after that stop, we were on our own. The air was soupy, cloudy and windy. Not ideal conditions, but at least the sun wasn't blazing on us. And then it did.

I've had some bad rides, but today, After about mile 50+, I sucked. It is incredible how it happens... suddenly the legs just don't go. By mile 70 some, I was on my last dregs and suffering greatly. Then we ate pbj sandwiches, and suddenly things were better. To bad there were so many hills left... as long as we were on the flat, I was fine. As soon as we turned up, I was off the back.

But I made it in. Saved two turtles including what must have been a fresh hatchling. I think J has poison oak now as she took the little tacker and put him in the woods and has these cool bumps all over her legs at the finish. There is a price to pay for being good, and J is always the best of us.

Ride to Provide... raised money for the Fan Free Clinic. It was one of the hardest, best rides we've done. We'll be back, but maybe not after doing a hard 100, and some hard workouts the week before!

Big people, little jobs...

2009-05-11T13:03:00.002-04:00

There are no small jobs...

And at the Sprint into Spring... no shortage of people ready to jump in and do the little things that needed to be done.

Thanks, Cliff, Steve and Tom for pushing water out of that one corner for HOURS. Its nice to know that my guys step up to the plate when needed, before you can even ask them!

Thanks Kevin Dillard for the photos!

Plasma 3

2009-05-08T20:21:00.002-04:00

Aw geez, now they've gone and done it... just make a bike that has me drooling all over...

At the Tour of California there were a lot of comments about the fact that the Scott sponsored Team High Road were not riding the Scott Plasma 2, but a variation of their test bike with Giant.

Now we know why... and man, I want, I want, I want.

I think the P4 looks nice, but I doubt that I could ride it. I bet I could make myself ride this one. And because I'd believe that I would be faster, I would be faster.

I saw photos earlier today and wish I had saved them all. All of a sudden, tt bikes are getting wildly creative. The front end on this bike is not to be believed.

Well, she'll be at the Giro... and it will be right interesting to see how she handles. I hear the tt course there is wild as well.

Stinky Shooz

2009-05-06T21:18:00.002-04:00

If you are gonna race in the rain... you better dry your shooz.

Sunday's women's cat 1-3 race was in a deluge. As soon as the 1-3 race was over, of course it dried out. Danielle and Gilbert wanted another official on the other side of the race course, so I got off my bike, threw it on the rack, and got into an officials shirt and khaki shorts and headed to the other side of the course.

Oh, yeah... I threw the shooz in the back of the truck.

Now like every card carrying woman I have multiple pairs of shooz, so Monday when I went out for a ride I just grabbed a spare.

Tuesday it poured and I didn't get to ride.

Wednesday J and Cliff came over and I grabbed yet another pair of shooz. Oh, yeah, and it rained on us again....

When we got back from dinner I saw the shooz I wore on Sunday... and then smelled them. And passed out. Or close to it.... But I did take the insole out. And water literally did come off of it.

Word to the wise. If you are gonna race in the rain... you gotta dry out your shooz. Otherwise the smell will create a hazmat situation. Honest.

How J rules racing in photos...

2009-05-06T08:57:00.004-04:00

J giving our new find instructions prior to the race. Christine is a great mtn biker and is gonna rule crits, too!

J showing Col. Sweatsalot how to scowl and look fierce...

J has scowling down pat...

The finish line after J launched her girls on the back side... We wanna be like J!

Sprint into Spring

2009-05-03T21:29:00.003-04:00

You gotta hand it to her, Col. Sweatsalot puts on a fine race. Things ran smooth, there was tons of help, games for the kids to play, a bike raffle, race announcers (Mark King, you should go pro...), top notch officiating, and more prizes, swag and primes than you see at anything other than an NRC race. Natures Path bars, Chipotle gift cards, Wawa Gift Cards and more...

Of course, there was that pesky little shower that seemed to dump 3' of water on the women's 1-3 race and the mens 3/4 race... but for all the water, the course was not slick, and the water was soon gone. Gone in one corner thanks to Cliff, Steve, and Tom, who pushed the water off the course between each lap for 3 races. They rock, big time.

A special thanks to our buddy Kevin Dillard who made the trip south to photograph our race. We love Kevin. I'm sure the photos will be up in a day or two... patience.

Of course I would be terribly remiss not to salute the big race of the day... the under 10 junior race, and especially the little 2 year old rider, Luke, on his Trek training wheel bike who made it around the WHOLE mile long course, up and down. The entire crowd was on their feet, with Gilbert ringing the bell for this little future champion. All around the course his Mom ran beside him telling him that he was a BIKE RIDER. I just wanted to eat him up.

And the hardest working domestique of the day... my bud J. She pulled my lazy ass around the field and set me up again... but I could just manage to get 3rd in the 40+ race. All that work for me. Sharon took full advantage of it, and threw her bike to take 1rst in the 4 race. Sharon rocks.

Then J did her best to help our buddy Pave Maria in the 1-3 race. Selfless, but wickedly fast, thats our Julie.

And what about Jake in the 1-3 race, who attacked, and attacked, and attacked, and attacked and finally on about the 100th go, got the right guy to go with him and just obliterated the field. One too many attacks and Jake had to settle for second, but I think he's going to be upgrading here to a 2 soon. Jake is a monster.

So another great race in the books, and when I finish the books I think we'll have a few thousand to donate the welfare fund for the soldiers on the base. Its all good.

Now I'm going to bed. Before 6-almost 10 pm with 2 races, and half the day officiating. I'm whooped.

Wintergreen Congrats

2009-05-02T15:25:00.002-04:00

As a non-climber, I can sincerely say that I had my best day ever on the mountain... I was the STARTER! The 30 seconds between riders was tough, but I think I got thru it relatively unscathed. I sure looked fresher than just about anyone on the top, thats for sure.

There were some wicked fast times up there with both Dee Dee Winfield and Jeremiah Bishop breaking the course records. I heard that the air was soupy mid-way, but I cant imagine that it was anything near as bad as the headwind and heat from last year.

So congrats to C'vill Racing and all their volunteers for putting on such an epic sufferfest... I volunteer to be the starter again next year!

Dumb Ass Award

2009-05-01T12:52:00.003-04:00

Down here in Va, the lists have been burning up with people demanding satisfaction for the lack of prosecution of motorists when they hit cyclists. I'm all for it.

But to be fair, I'm going to start handing out dumb ass awards...

So award one goes to the cyclist in the yellow jersey on Hugenot Rd today about 12:15. FYI, Hugenot is being repaved and there is one lane open in each direction. No problem for our hero... he made his own lane and was just zipping up the line of cars. There was some debris on the left side of the lane, so I started to swing right, and if I hadn't have gotten a glimpse of the jerk would have nailed him.

Uh, its a two lane road. A work zone. One lane was closed. Just because you are on your bike doesn't mean the rules don't apply...

Kind of like the two motorcyclists on 64 E a week ago... who decided that since both lanes were going slow, that they'd just make their own lane up the middle.

We call you... organ donors.

You know its bad when another cyclist calls you out.

The other side of races:

2009-04-30T19:39:00.002-04:00

You know, the race promotion side! Good ole Sharon is the real promoter, mover, and shaker behind our Sprint into Spring race, I'm just the money bags who has to deal with the Army bureaucracy. Bless her heart, she took 3 days off work to deal with the last minute stuff for the race and wouldn't you know it, she had to be in meetings (you know, for WORK!) on her days off when she was going to get stuff done.

So I love the panic emails that I get from her Crackberry when she remembers something vitally important mid-meeting.

Some how, some way, everything will work out just fine. It always does.

This is going on while I'm doing the pre-work for the State Senior TT. I get the flier up earlier than everyone else, and suddenly I have multiple emails asking when the race will be up on Bikereg. Damn, the race isn't until mid-June. I know no one is going to enter that early! I can't get people to enter until the last possible moment!

This year there is no tandem category at our tt. I really tried, honest I did. Every year I'd work over the RATS (Richmond Area Tandem Society?) and every year they'd swear that they were going to enter. Yes, it really does cost to have the category. I never charged extra for the tandems, even though I'd pay per rider fees. And with the category at the end of the day, with a big break from the last single rider (to discourage um... drafting...) I paid thru the nose for police.

So if you want your category at races... enter. Don't bemoan the fact that there isn't a 80+ category if no 80+ riders ever enter. This year I added a 70+ category as I know that they are out there. So if you'd like to see it again, ENTER!

The New Specialized Transition?

2009-04-28T08:29:00.003-04:00

Front view: Damn, its hard to find a bike in that picture!

Side View

Diamonds might be a girl's best friend, but I sure do love tt bikes. Every year, our friends come up with the latest and the greatest go-fast machines. Taller, skinnier, thicker, thinner, sloped, not sloped, sharp edges, smooth edges, you could drive yourself silly trying to keep up.

Cervelo P3 is the best bike in the world because Spartacus rides one and hands out whoop ass to everyone. Then he rides a Specialized and beats everyone on the Cervelo P3 (cuz for some reason no pros are riding the P4...). So does the fact that he still is fast on the new bike make the new bike a better bike than the old bike? Or could it possibly be that he smokes everyone else because he is just fast as shi*?

I have this theory... sometimes when people buy that $10,000 bike, they BELIEVE it will make them faster. So they train harder, and voila they are faster! Hey, if a placebo works, go for it!

When the MIT study came out I bet a lot of manufacturer's jaws dropped... an aero helmet, worn correctly, gives the same time advantage as a disc wheel. So why do so many people shell out a ton of money for disc wheels, but ride in a regular helmet?

And the uber-expensive disc wheels? If they are so good, then why when the fine folks at Cervelo were designing the new P4 did they design the bike so that those wheels won't fit? Cervelo says that their bike doesn't need them. Can anybody really show that the sub-9 disc is really an advantage? If so, how much of one? Is it really $1500 more aero than a $500 Renn disc? Or how about a Hed Jet wheel with a disc cover... at least there you get a wheel you can do crits on and a wheel that becomes a disc wheel. All at a fraction of the cost.

I love all the new bikes. I'm pretty sure that I couldn't ride anything that low, and I'm pretty sure that 99% of the tt bike market couldn't either. (Which is why most people sell their P3's or put a ton of spacers under the bars) They sure are pretty, and I'm sure that whatever Spartacus rides that he will hand the competition his can of whoop ass.

I think I'll keep my out of date Scott, and bank that money for bad times.

Hero to Zero

2009-04-27T08:11:00.002-04:00

Yesterday was the Van Dessel Crit in Waynesboro. Waynesboro is a wonderful town, with a rich history of outdoorsiness. (is that a word?) I've done some cool races there, running, tris and crits. The community is always super supportive. Thanks to the Van Dessel Team for bringing bike racing back to this cool town!

Unfortunately for me, different courses for different horses. This course is not for me. It goes up, then up, then turns left, and goes up, and turns left again to go up AGAIN. Then you get the cool screaming downhill, a turn to a flat stretch and then you get to do it all over again.

At least we raced at 6 pm. By then the clouds were coming in, the wind was picking up and the heat was dissipating some. All of us were cameling up... drinking as much as we could pre-race as the carnage in the early races was generally due to dehydration.

J ran a 10k in Fredericksburg in her usual blistering fashion, so I knew that she wasn't going to have a lot in the tank. Sharon officiated all day. And me, like I said, not my kind of course. I made it around... just barely, and at least can say that I got a good, hard work out in as Rachel and crew lapped me out there!

It was good to watch our friends at Natures Path completely control and dominate the men's 1-3 race. If you wanted to explain team tactics to someone, that was the race to watch. Good show guys!

We rolled in at home after 10 pm, and this is going to be a very sleepy day.

I've love dogs... but....

2009-04-25T11:23:00.002-04:00

It really is dog owners that SUCK! Just the bad dog owners.

A year ago I had a talk with a RICH lady down the street from me. I was having to out sprint her dog on almost a daily basis, and the dog was getting peeved that it wasn't getting to bite me. And the dog was getting smarter... and laying in wait. Nice thing about riding at the same time of day... it puts the smart dogs on a schedule. Dogs love schedules.

So I stopped and talked to her one day. The whole time I was talking to her I had to use the bike as a shield to keep said dog from making me into a Scoobysnack. She admitted to me that she KNEW the dog was going after cyclists, but she didn't like keeping the dog penned up.

Well, after about 15 minutes of listening to this crap I told her what I did for a living. I told her that she was on notice, that failing to do anything about this situation was the definition of gross negligence, and that if I got bit, or heard of anyone else getting bit, that I'd do everything I could to make sure that she payed for it.

That seemed to have gotten her attention. The dog "disappeared." I thought that maybe she took it to animal control, or locked it up, or something.

He's back. I was out tooling around this morning doing an easy 30 before Waynesboro tomorrow. The pollen is so thick out here that I couldn't sprint if my life depended on it anyway... So of course, as I rode by her house, the dog jumped out of the brush and missed me by about an inch, I swerved, almost crashed and if there had been a car coming the other way... I'd be dead. So I'm screaming BAD DOG!!! BAD DOG!!! and I know the lady heard me and didn't do anything.

I'm waiting for animal control to call me back. This is going to be over. Today. Dogs I can deal with. Bad owners...

Go George!

2009-04-23T10:32:00.003-04:00

George is now sitting at #13 in the country... moving on up! As much as I love having him out with Gina, and as much as he LOVES her, I sure do miss my running buddy.

He's in Delaware this weekend... Maine next weekend. I swear that dog is traveling more than me these days.

Oh MY GAWD

2009-04-22T15:46:00.002-04:00

Oh, man, oh, man, oh, man

Sharon just called and we're going to FRANCE! She WON THE GRAND PRIZE at the AMGEN Tour of California, and we're going to France for the last week of the Tour d'France, airfare, hotel, meals, VIP, FRONT ROW...

OH MY GAWD!!

Life is GOOD!!!!

Get em before they get you...

2009-04-22T15:34:00.002-04:00

There is something to be said for just blowing up the bad guys. I'd imagine that it has a real deterrent effect, especially when I keep hearing these funny reports about how Somali women are flocking to Mogadishu to marry pirates. Maybe if the odds of them actually coming back with $$ are changed a bit, the pirates will think twice about attacking ships.

No really... just maybe...

Oh, well. It has been Navy kind of weather every night so far. Monday it was thunderstorms and tornadoes. Last night it was hail and thunderstorms. I know that it hailed at my house earlier today, but I BELIEVE that God is going to let me ride outside tonight. I need my fix, really, really bad...

The weekend in review...

2009-04-19T18:31:00.002-04:00

Saturday was a good day. J came over and rode at O'Dark Thirty with me so that we could get to the club picnic. After a few miles of snuffling, gagging, spitting and other nastiness I looked down at my tires... which were formerly black. Today, pollen yellow-green. Pollen, its just evil.

The picnic though, was grand. Our friends at Fiorucci hosted us at their plant in Colonial Heights. While Cliff and I were waiting for Carey to show up, turkeys flew over our head... in a business park. Carey later told me that they occasionally get bobcats in the compound. Too cool.

Gregg and Sandee arranged a group photo shoot and video for the Fiorucci website. I'm sure it will be up later in the season so go take a look. Fiorucci is not only a great company to work with, but they have great products as well. Give 'em a try. As usual, they will be donating prize bags of their wonderful products for the State Time trial. So plan on being fast that day, those bags are worth about $25 each.

Saturday night I went out to buy tomato plants for the garden. Oh, man! Someone has figured out that the country is in a recession and everyone is going to be planting gardens this year. The cost of plants is thru the roof. I got pissed and went to a small farmers market and bought my plants. If Home Depot and Lowes are going to jack up their prices, I'll just take my business elsewhere. So there... pffft....

Sunday was the Casey Auto Crit... but run backwards this year. The course was both safer and faster in this direction, so good call JRVS.

I must be getting a bad rep... when the officials meet you on the line and ask you where your inhaler is... you got a problem. The pollen was knee deep and there was lovely wisteria growing and blooming all along the course. I knew I was in trouble... and so did the officials. Lucky for me I carry a pot of Vicks in the truck. I smeared so much of it on my face that no pollen was going to enter these lungs. of course I was living in fear that I'd forget and wipe my nose or something, but you gotta do what you gotta do.

How'd it go? The Rostello girls just rocked. 4 laps to go, we were all up front, organizing the train, and being safe. J lead us out and took 5th, I was 1rst 40+ and Col. Sweatsalot was 2nd cat 4. You gotta love it when a plan comes to fruition. This was after J had gotten run off the course not once, but twice by the same rider. Not cool.

I do have a world's record to hand out... to the rider in our race who gave us five different reasons she didn't win. The question is... are the five reasons cumulative... or does one supersede the others. The five reasons were given over a span of about an hour... and when the next one was given, the preceding one was apparently forgotten. I'm sure that if we had hung around a few minutes longer there would have been a 6th and 7th reason... maybe more. By now I'm sure that there was a solar flare that disrupted the electrical charge of the earth or something. Keep 'em coming, it's highly amusing. We do give bonus points for creativity... so keep trying...

And congrats to Gregg... I got a call when I was out planting green beans... 8th in the big cat 4 field, and wisely rode AHEAD of the two crashes. There is a reason why the top pros ride at the front of the peloton.

And BEST WISHES and SUPER SPEEDY RECOVERY to Wes King. Wes, you are NOT the Natures Path guy that we expect to see kissing asphalt. J and I were on the side road and let the ambulance onto the course for the crash. We had no idea it was for you. Take the drugs, don't worry, be happy.

And the biggest hugs and congrats to our adopted team mate Eli Hunt and her hubby Roger. Preggers! Man, are we happy for you both. Roger, I would have kissed you, but the Vicks on my face, just gross, you know?

Suit Happy?

2009-04-17T08:48:00.002-04:00

There has been some interesting discussion on the MABRA list about what clubs have to do to put on a "fun" event. It sounds easy, and heck the bike couriers and scofflaws do "Slaughterama" and other races all the time. All those races are "unofficial", have no police, no permits and from what I've seen, are generally dangerous as hell.

But you never hear about law suits from those events. I say little wonder, most of those people have nothing to get in a suit. If they were sued, they would either just declare bankruptcy or not pay a judgment. There really is something to be said about blood, turnips, and all that.

Lots of us though have houses, cars, real jobs, and stuff. For us, getting sued can have some real meat to it. And you'd be surprised at what you can be sued for. And you'd be surprised at how hard it can be to get out of a suit. And you might be surprised that your home owners carrier wont cover you for some things. Like racing... but that's up to you to look at your own insurance policy.

The people who think that they cant be sued in an under the table event... that only the cyclist involved in a crash would be sued... Uh, you are probably wrong. The more people invited to the party, the greater the opportunity for the plaintiff to recover. So if you have any of your little fingers in the event, you can be sued. Heck, even if you don't have any of your little fingers in the event, you may be able to be sued. If they can keep you in a suit is another matter, but you wouldn't care because suits have a nasty habit of taking over your life.

And while we're at it... remember that cyclists who get hit by negligent drivers sue those drivers. Sometimes. Sometimes they win. Sometimes they loose. Its just fair that if cyclists are negligent and cause bad accidents to innocent drivers that those same drivers get to sue the cyclist. And if you are a promoter who puts on an unsafe event, sanctioned or otherwise, that puts the public at risk... well, its just fair that you get it, too.

So when we as promoters are putting on an event... safety is always job one. Down the road is a fair event, etc... and in the top five, you better be thinking about what can happen if you aren't putting on a safe event. And that includes club rides, training rides, and anything else.

There are plenty of attorneys who race bikes. When in doubt ask one. And anytime you want to be regaled with stories of incredible suits, just ask me...

Paying for two seats...

2009-04-16T15:49:00.002-04:00

I don't know about you all, but I hate to fly.

Its not just the lost baggage... I've gotten to the point that I can get away with almost never checking a bag.

Its not just the delays and cancellations that leave you stranded...

And it sure isn't that they don't feed you on planes. I never ate that crap anyway.

For me, its having to absolutely defend my territory, aka my seat. Airline seats are not huge, and as a woman, big guys think that my space is their space. So the first thing I do is put the arm rest down and put my arm on it. That defines that this is MY SPACE. That is YOUR SPACE. The fact that you cant fit in YOUR space is by definition YOUR problem.

Except it never works out that way...

Today another airline announced that the large Marge's of the world are going to have to cough up the $$ for an extra seat if they cant fit in their seat. From my perspective, its not just the obese people, though. Ever see a 6'6" guy try to fit into an economy seat? Butt wise they fit. Leg wise, no chance.

There has got to be a better way. Maybe they have first class seats, cattle car seats, and for a little extra money, wide-body or leg room seats. Heck if the airline can charge you $5 for a hot beer, they ought to be able to figure out how to charge extra for a little more space.

Just my opinion. But I think that the airlines are in the business of making people be as miserable as possible, so I may not exactly be objective here...

It'll move you to tears...

2009-04-15T18:43:00.002-04:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RxPZh4AnWyk&feature=bz301

Criminy, I watched it this morning after hearing about it on the way in to work. I dont watch all the Idol shows, who has the time.

But watching this train wreck of a person walk out on stage, and then to hear the angels sing... I admit it. I cried.

If you only have one moment in the sun, I sure hope its like the one that lady got.

Bravo. God was having a particularly good day when he made that lady.

Easter will be a little late...

2009-04-12T21:05:00.003-04:00

Did the Easter Bunny skip your house this morning? Tell the kids he's gonna be a wee bit late...

Seems J was riding out near Tappahannock this morning, when Peter Cottontail decided that life was just too rough, what with having to carry around all that candy for all those screaming kids and all...

So Peter decided to end it all in a death by bicycle scenario. J sends her condolences to little children everywhere...

GOOOOOO Navy!

2009-04-12T16:20:00.002-04:00

I got back in from my ride to the news that Capt. Phillips was rescued... Go Navy. And all the bad guys are now shark food. I hope the sharks dont get too bad a tummy ache.

What a wonderful Easter present for all of America.

Warm fuzzies all around.

Happy Easter!

Happy Easter

2009-04-10T10:46:00.002-04:00

Well whats an Easter post without the random puppy, kitty and bunny shots? It would be sad, so sad. So here's George, posing pretty after snarfing down a good snack. BTW: Georgie is in Perry GA this week royally kicking booty... I miss him something fierce, but he looooves to show, loves the applause and TREATS and all the fanfare. Go George!

And just cuz you cant slight the bunnies and kitties out there...

Twins, separated at birth...

What am I doing for Easter? I'm going to ride my bike, thank you. I'm hoping for a nice long one on Sunday after I clean the sludge off it on Saturday. (Its supposed to rain on Saturday, so I'm going to wait until after I ride to clean it. ) To say the Orbea is skanky would be an understatement. J thinks that we've both been suffering so much this week because our bikes are mad at us.

I believe her. It couldn't possibly be because I SUCK. That would be an outrageous thing to think.

Sunday I'm also going to finish up the pre-work on the veggie garden. I usually don't plant until April 16th. Before that you can get frost, and nothing is going to grow until the soil gets warm, anyway. I'm dreaming of fresh tomatoes. Oh, and squash, and peppers! Fresh basil. Basil and tomatoes. Geez... I'm starving.

Happy Easter. Hope the bun-buns bring you something wonderful.

I'm TTing away...

2009-04-06T08:53:00.003-04:00

I ditched the diet for the weekend. Ok, not exactly ditched... I just ate non-boxed food like chicken, veggies, and fruit. Racing on no calories is not exactly the way to win big. Not that carrying around junk is a way to win big, either.

The Canal TT course is beautiful. Where else can you get a drag strip, closed course, along a beautiful canal? Not to mention that the trip down was full of such wonderful sights as the pelicans coming in for a landing on the river. If that's not something that will get you out of bed at 5 am, I'm not sure what will.

I've been without a computer at home for about a month now so Sharon had to tell me my start time. Normally I'm really anal about the details, but did I check when I got to the race? Nope. I also didn't bring the necessities of TT'ing, like chamois cream, gum, extra water, etc... Lucky for me I have Sharon.

No, really lucky for me I have Sharon. I was out warming up thinking that my start time was 9:20 and hers was 9:12. I was going to zip in and yell for her at the start when I found out that nope, MY TIME WAS 9:12. I've never missed a tt start and my love for my team mate kept that streak alive.

Did I mention there were more 40+ women entered than cat 1-2 men? Who says women wont race. It was AWESOME. Kudo's to BJ and the Vanderkitties... I just love it when anyone does anything that brings more women to this sport. I told BJ that when I used to direct and promote Women's Distance Festival races to bring women into the sport, that it was almost always women 30++ who were my first timers. They were not normal runners, were at a point in their lives that they decided to do SOMETHING to change their lives. They needed lots of support, but in the end, they become lifers. So KUDOS. I'm awful proud of you all.

The TT was good for me. With a hard week of dieting, and spotty training the distance played up to what I do best... riding by analysis. I went out relatively easy with the goal of building from the turn around and crushing the last few miles. I was really happy with what I did. What time did I ride? No idea. I'm sure that I was 2nd or 3rd, but we'll see...

Thanks to Brian (Stormyworld) who saved my butt during my "barking seal" routine after the race. Yes, the asthma has been giving me fits, but at least it waited until I crossed the line to rear its ugly head. And yes, I'm going to start leaving a drop bag with an inhaler at finish lines from now on. (and yes, today my chest feels like a bus landed on it. ..)

Thanks to the Pyeman for doing all the great things that he does, like suffering thru taking my booties off my feet. I know that was a bad job. Love ya man, mean it. We really do only hurt the ones we love.

Thanks also to Sharon who went over to the PLT course with me so that I could get some more miles in. Now if there was ever a place that is going to set off an asthma attack, its out there. The swamp was all the way up to the road, and just looked slimy as all get out. It didn't seem to be bothering the ducks, geese, turtles and SNAKES in it that we saw though!

6 miles in to that ride, the hunger pains started knocking... and never let up until we finally got to the VA Diner at 1. While everyone there was eating fried chicken, macaroni and cheese and collard greens, Sweatsalot and I were eating grilled chicken and salad. Dieting is NOT fun.

And while everyone thinks that bike racing pulls families apart... watching the Tour of Flanders I had to call my Dad. He would always laugh at me and tell me how flat Belgium is. Hah, so I called him when Devolder was just crushing the field and told him to turn on VS to see the Belgian "flatland..." Getting to share the experience with my Dad... "PRICELESS...."

Day 3, 2 lbs and gut lock

2009-04-01T09:21:00.003-04:00

One of my attorneys in Florida went on Nutrisystem and just raved about it. I think he's lost about 50 lbs., was never hungry and trust me, he doesn't exercise. Since time is my biggest problem- I decided to give this stuff a whirl. With food in a box, that doesn't even have to be refrigerated, I really have no excuses.

Started Monday, and I've lost two pounds. The food isnt bad. Ok, the minestrone soup is really bad... the chocolate cake snack is actually pretty good. So that balances out. Yeah, the chicken breast patty smells until you heat it up. That kind of turned my Princess Gut a bit. But you have to add your own veggies and fruit which is just fine with me. The garden is tilled and the seeds have sprouted on the kitchen table under the grow lights...

What I'm not digging... gut lock. You'd think with the amount of fiber this stuff packs that we'd have some kind of movement... but you'd be wrong. Something is going to have to give here soon or the TT on Sunday is going to be another exercise in pain.

Nothing ever comes easy. Lunch today is fettuccine in a dehydrated soup container. I bet thats just yummy! And trust me, that picture of Nutrisystem pizza... it doesn't look like that in real life.

Picking your wins....

2009-03-30T08:06:00.002-04:00

Some weekends you just have to pick your wins. Sunday was Jeff Cup and my race was over well before it started. With no fitness, and heavy fog to niggle my asthma I was out on the course to have a day on the bike. I made it with the pack half way up the hill at the winery, and then just rode what the lungs could do. That is until the sun came out and dried up the fog. Then miraculously I was fine.

Poor J wasnt fine, she was with the lead pack until 1k to go, and then cramped so bad that she couldn't pedal. Some days.

And Sharon who I would say in horse lingo... "full bloom with dapples" was raring to go. All week she was up on her toes, pulling at the bit. And she got stuck behind 2 count em 2 crashes to have her day effectively ended early. Some days...

So this week we are celebrating GEORGE! Georgie Baby is kickin butt and takin' names on the show circuit with my buddy Gina. He won Best of Breed both days this weekend over the dog who is going to be the new #1 Brittany in the country. (Thats 3 for 3 in head to head competition for George with that dog.) Last week Gina took him down to Danville for the Gun Dog Nationals and George got to hang out and be a dog. This week, he's brushed and fluffed and playing the part of a show dog. Go GEORGE!

And if the next time you see me I'm a little meaner... today was day one of Nutrisystem. It's 8:00 and I'm starving already. A little less junk in the trunk might make me climb a bit better though.

The Bob Waddle

2009-03-24T09:05:00.002-04:00

When I go away on business, my dogs go on a vacation to Cliff's house. Think of going on a cruise, but on land. There are rides, swimming, hiking, and of course... EATING. Cliff is sure that my dogs never get enough to eat. They tell him that all the time.

So there is breakfast with the Captain, brunch on the veranda, mid-morning snacks after a swim. Oh, then lunch. And after a Kubota ride, you have to have cookies... Then there is a formal dinner, and late night buffet on the Ledo Deck.

Poor Bob. He comes home and all the goodies are gone. I got home just in time. Bob can hardly waddle. I had to take his collar off as it was too tight. To pick him up... man, thats a weight lifting session.

The guys are looking at me like they'd really like for me to go away again. I was drinking a Slimfast this morning for breakfast to try to help with my own little Bob Waddle.... Bob just looked at me like there was no way he was going to be forced to drink that crap... you know, unless it was served on the Ledo Deck. Maybe after cookies, for a late, late, night snack...

Back on the ball again...

2009-03-23T15:09:00.002-04:00

There is no place like home, there's no place like home. You'd think that I'd love being in Florida for work, and you'd be wrong. I was soo glad to get home, to sleep in my own bed, to snuggle with my dogs, and to ride my bikes. Oh, yeah, and to do over the phone coaching with my girls... Geez, you really do miss your buds when you are away.

Saturday it was the team presentation for Richmond Pro Cycling and Craig and the boys looked fabulous. The food at Savour was great, the wine, not so much. But, I'm hoping that it was a good fund raiser for them and for the Faison School (Autism). I have a friend with an autistic son who is a math whiz. Autism is near and dear to my heart.

Sunday, J and Colsweatsalot went down and had fun at the Sleepyhole crit. As the first real crit of the year, its tough to get the kinks out and Ive been told that the women's race was squirrely as hell, but no one died. Its always a good day when everyone come's back alive. Sharon was kept in place by J and Pave Maria... J said that I didnt even have to be there to be there. Maybe I can get my boss to believe the same thing... really, I dont have to go to Florida for trial, I'll be there even if I'm not there.

Now Sharon says that she knows that she's ok when she can hear my breathe. Maybe I can play tapes of me snuffling in courtrooms and people will think that I'm there, too...

And to Maria: riddle me this: How in the hell do you manage to get off the bike, barf, and get back in with the pack? Crap, last year I got off the back wheel of someone and sat 9' off the back and couldn't get back on to save my life. And I didn't barf. Although I really wanted to!

One little Karenism for the day... as a small word of encouragement for our newbie cat 4 chickies... if you have an open field, remember that those girls are out there racing with the cat 1 old timers. You guys dont throw your newbies to the wolves like that. Give the newbies a wee bit of encouragement. Have a separate pay out... of SOMETHING for the chicklets. It doesnt have to be much. We're getting an fairly high percentage of cat1 and cat 2 women in the area. Lets do what we can to encourage newbies.

And on that note: our Ft Lee race will again have a separate cat 4, 40+ womens race. Yeah, there are some cat 1 40+ers out there, but at least they are older! (and wiser)

Spring Break?

2009-03-18T19:41:00.002-04:00

Ok, so I'm down here in Ft Meyers with all the teeny boppers with perky ti, well you know...

Except I'm here working, in a freezing cold courthouse. I can save businesses and municipalities in Florida a ton of money... turn off the a/c. When I got to the hotel my room was set on 62 degrees. First day of trial and I'm in a cute little short sleeve suit and just about froze my whatsit off. Today, I wised up and wore a long sleeve suit. Tomorrow I'm out of suits and will have to make due with a long sleeve dressy shirt. Its just nutz. Everyone over 25 is in long sleeves.

And everywhere I eat, some 20 something calls me "sweetie..." Baby, I stopped being sweet a looong time ago. It could be worse, they could call me ma'am. Oh, and in the land of fresh fruit, no one is serving fresh fruit. The hotel has a 12.00 breakfast buffet, and the fruit is melon from Mexico. No strawberries and no citrus. Nutz.

Now if I can just get the other defendants at trial to bring me some oranges, life would be good. If not, tomorrow there is a farmers market, and somehow I'm going to get there and eat until I get sick.

Oh, and I'm going thru serious withdrawal. First no bike. Nuff said. Second, no wine. I refuse to drink crap, and since my hotel is in the boonies, and I have no car, its a hike to get to anywhere. We had lunch at a bistro near the courthouse today and the ladies in the table next to us were drinking what looked to be a really nice Chablis... just like any coke head I started to drool, and shake and go into the dt's. I went so far to drink a beer at dinner, and sweetie, its just not the same.

One more day of trial tomorrow and then I'm flying back on Friday. Let me tell you, there are liars, damn liars and statisticians. Any series of numbers can say anything you want them to. Please don't let facts get in the way of whatever you want to say. And my favorite phrase of the day is that " I know this from my long years of experience." Which means exactly whatever you want it to mean. If I drank a whole bottle of that nice Chablis at lunch I'd probably know that the sun rises in the West. You know, from my 43 years of experience...

Saturday, rain or shine, I'm on the bike. There really is no place like home...

God is trying to tell me something...

2009-03-15T16:05:00.002-04:00

Everyone has their own little tricks to get them thru a time trial. I play music in my head. Happy music. And I plan which songs I'm going to have go on in there for different parts of the course. Today was not going to be a happy music day.

I'm heading down to Dismal Dash... and I realize that I have left my towels by the door.

Then I realize that when I packed up the truck Saturday night that I left the Garmin on the charger. Ok, its raining, its cold, I have no towels, my fitness level sucks, and oh, I have no computer. All ok. I dont flap easy. I can deal with all this.

Then I pick up my chip as this race is chip timed. And by the time I get back to the truck I discover that I have dropped the chip somewhere. And I cant find it. So I have to go beg for another, with the understanding that if it doesn't turn up I'm going to be out some dough.

Ok.

And then I take the bike out of the truck and start to put the wheels on it. Whereupon I discover that my hub on my disc wheel has separated from the wheel. (just the body, not the actual spindle.) I almost put the bike back in the truck, but said f'it. It wasn't a crit, and since I could jimmy everything back on, and got it real tight with the skewer, I figured if I crashed, I wasn't going to take anyone else out. Plus it was raining, and you usually get hurt less crashing in the rain.

Riding around the parking lot, I found the chip in a pothole full of water. This after getting a new number, so I just turned the chip in.

At the start there was a huge gap in the 40+ chicks field, so the likelihood of me having carrots to run down was small. Oh, and my team mate who had gum for me ended up on another part of the course.

When I got going I had no idea what kind of speed I was carrying. Which was probably a blessing as my finish time was a new personal worst. What happened to the happy little diddy that I normally play in my head? It kept getting taken over by that song from the Color Purple... God is trying to tell you something. You know, right now. I kept battling back with the theme from Rocky, but I'd get half a verse in, and then whammo, the record would change. Kind of schizophrenic time trial thinking...

Oh, and if anyone finds these really cool gel arm pads for aero bars... they are mine. After the turn around I kept feeling this hard edge on my arms, but just decided to suffer thru. I'm figuring when I got out of the saddle to get back up to speed the arm pads must have stuck to me instead of the bars and took the chance to liberate themselves.

I made it back in, new personal worst time ever, but somehow with a few $$ to pay for a whole new set of arm pads. Tommorrow I'm off to Florida for the ultimate stupid trial of the year. I'll spend a whole week listening to hydrology, climate, crop, economic experts and will try hard not to rip my eyes out. By the end of the week, I think I'll have set a new sufferfest record. First today, and then the trial. I figure that I should be ready to kill tt's after this week. After this week the rest of the season is going to be EASY!

Thanks to all the officials and volunteers for suffering thru me today. Yes, I actually have done this before. Maybe once or twice...

Lil Belgian Weather...

2009-03-14T10:31:00.002-04:00

You'd think that I would be genetically suited to weather like today. Dad's family is from Norway, and heck, they all lived in Iowa. Mom's family was Scotts/German. You'd think a day like today, a balmy 36 degrees and light rain should be just up alley. And you'd be wrong. Oh, so wrong.

Rain is supposed to be heavy after about 12, so I headed out in the drizzle to get a few miles in these legs that have no miles in them. Yeah, I could have ridden the trainer, but I knew that I wouldn't ride long enough, or hard enough. So I put on a thermal jersey, thermal tights, a skull cap, my best gloves and a really nice Gore Tex jacket that I got when I used to do some testing for Gore. Most days that's too much, today... thank God for the bodacious amount of clothes that I have.

I saw bluebirds, piliated wood peckers, and robins galore. What didn't I see? Cyclists. Since I live on the great bike way... either they were wimps or I was just plain kwayzee. I think the people in the cars that were passing me were pretty sure it was the later. I could see little old ladies looking out the window with severe looks of disapproval on their pinched faces as they passed me. You know what they were saying... "See Milton, like I always told you. Those bike freaks are just nutz. Someone ought to do the world a favor and lock them up! Hurmph"

I'm back now, and I'm going to soak in the tub until I warm up again. I may get out by tomorrow in time for the Dismal Dash. Or maybe not. Its probably going to take about 3 or 4 fresh tubs of water just to get all the mud out of my hair from the back spray. A few more after that and I might thaw out.

Why dogs matter

2009-03-11T08:49:00.002-04:00

Because everyday that I look in my dog's eyes I know that there is a God. There are just some beings on this earth that make the world a better place.

But I'm really scared. There are several mainstream groups out there that want to eliminate dogs. To me, this world would just SUCK without dogs. Dogs RULE.

Who are these dastardly organizations? Don't you just want to go out and make sure they fail? Want to be shocked? Do ya?

The Humane Society of the United States (HSUS) and People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA). I don't know how PETA who kills 97% of the dogs that it takes in can call itself "ethical", but they can call themselves "purple" for all I care. PETA you may recall had several employees arrested not to long ago for going down to North Carolina, taking dogs out of animal shelters by telling the staff that they would get good homes. Yeah, and a few miles down the road PETA's little mobile snuff van killed them.

What did they get arrested for? Littering... the staff couldn't stand the stench of the dead dogs, so they would regularly go to a dumpster behind a shopping center and dump the dead bodies. Don't believe it? Do a google search on the internet. Oh, and ask PETA why they don't have any shelters, have a 15,000 walk in freezer in the basement of their Norfolk, VA headquarters, and got a per lb. rate with a local crematorium.

Think HSUS operates your local shelter? Nope. HSUS operates NO shelters.

Some quotes in their own words:

In The Animal Rightist's Own Words: From Wayne Pacelle (President) The HSUS
We have no ethical obligation to preserve the different breeds of livestock produced through selective breeding ...One generation and out. We have no problems with the extinction of domestic animals. They are creations of human selective breeding. (Animal People News, May 1, 1993)
We would be foolish and silly not to unite with people in the public health sector, the environmental community, [and] unions, to try to challenge corporate agriculture. ("Animal Rights Convention 2002" convention, July 1, 2002)
Our goal is to get sport hunting in the same category as cock fighting and dog fighting.Bozeman (MT) Daily Chronicle (October 8, 1991)

More From The ARs...PETA, Ingrid Newkirk (President)
There’s no rational basis for saying that a human being has special rights. A rat is a pig is a dog is a boy. They’re all animals.- Washingtonian magazine (August 1, 1986)
Pet ownership is an absolutely abysmal situation brought about by human manipulation.- Harper's (August 1, 1988)
The bottom line is that people don't have the right to manipulate or to breed dogs and cats... If people want toys, they should buy inanimate objects. If they want companionship, they should seek it with their own kind.- Animals (May 1, 1993)
There is no hidden agenda. If anybody wonders about -- what’s this with all these reforms -- you can hear us clearly. Our goal is total animal liberation.- “Animal Rights 2002” convention (June 30, 2002)

Like your dog? HSUS and PETA call dog ownership SLAVERY. PETA had the gall to protest the Westminster KC dressed as the Klu Klux Klan.

Want to do something for animal welfare? Donate directly to your local shelter. Better yet, volunteer there.

As we say in the rescue biz: Saving one dog's life may not change the world... but it sure makes a world of change to that one dog. And when PETA says that all dogs are better off dead than to be owned... I'm not sure that one dog would agree.

Life is good

2009-03-08T13:51:00.003-04:00

Some weekends turn out just perfect. Or in my case, as close to perfect as you can get.

I was over at Cliff's getting veggie skewers and chicken ready for the grill when he whispered that the beavers were back. I got out on the deck just in time to see the beavers tug boating it up into the creek looking for low hanging branches to munch on. Beavers are seriously cool.

We took the dogs out for a hike and not only did we have a mouse chase, but I got to see some wood ducks on the river as well. Like I said, damn near perfect.

Today I got to try out the new tt bars on a ride with Cliff and Paul. Yep, I think they are going to work just fine. I pulled us up 623 at 25 mph and everything felt like it was supposed to.

It was funny, coming home there was someone who had a car like J's trying to back out of my driveway. She couldn't quite get it figured out and almost backed over us as we were pulling in. She said that she was looking for somewhere to park and I told her that she could park on my access road. Then she asked if the owner would give permission. Since I live on the Great Bike Way, and pretty much everyone around here knows where Camp Runamuck is... I knew that she wasn't from around here... nope, from Texas. I just hope she figures out how to back up a car when she gets back from her ride...

Tonight bbq pork tenderloin and more veggie skewers on the grill. Oh, and the Paris-Nice race on vs. Yep, life is good.

Pedal Power

2009-03-07T14:04:00.002-05:00

Since my fitness is abysmal from the 6 weeks I've been babying my leg, and J has a big 8k road race tomorrow, we did the first Pedal Power race at Endorphin. Seriously cool- a computrainer race designed to show how hard it is to create and store energy, so that people have a better understanding of energy conservation. J and I are totally in to this. We better be, since Felix is on the Gov.'s Energy Commission, and has just started a new alternative energy company. Go ahead, ask me about solar...

One thing I can do, is measure effort and give it all... and having every one's times, watts, etc... up on a screen... just makes it so much easier for me. While the computrainer is a hell of a work out, it is not like riding on the road. With my fitness level I would have been dropped big time at the races this morning at Bryan Park. Despite my fitness level, Julie and I won. Overall.

One of the guys came up to me afterward and told me how cool it was that I ran everyone down. Yep, that's me, analytical. I knew exactly where my barf point was, and rode about 2 watts under that. I'm pretty sure that Molly would not have wanted to clean up after me had I gone over the line. J had to ride blind, but as usual, she blew everyone away in the w/kg arena. Don't mess with J. I needed the feedback, she just goes. Like an Energizer Bunny on steroids. Cept with J, there are no drugs needed. Wickedocity, yep, she's the definition.

So what did we get in our major haul? Hot damn... we got a back pack that has a small solar panel that can charge your cell phone when you put it in the sun. Oh, and a couple of these great rechargeable battery packs, headsweats, tshirts, hats, eco-friendly water bottles... and a $25.00 gift card to 3sports. Each. Damn, life is good.

I'm probably going to need that solar powered cell phone charger though. Like the slippery little sucker it is... my cell phone slipped out and decided to stay at Endorphin over the weekend. So since I have no home phone, all my friends will be calling the cell phone all weekend running down the batteries. Lets hope I can find it Monday when the batteries are dead and I cant hear it ring.

Gotta love the Pyeman

2009-03-06T09:02:00.003-05:00

After my team mate Mark got tossed around like a rag doll, stomped on, kicked and run over, he was bored silly and spent gobs of time self medicating thru retail therapy. After he got a killer deal on a Trek TT frame, and a whole bunch of components, he found that his new find, killer ITM carbon aerobars just didn't fit his newly smooshed body and deformed shoulder.

Lucky me. I was able to get the bars, and for a really nice Cabernet, Mark put them on and rerouted all my cables. Isn't she pretty!

Now I have to get out the Adamo saddle to try to make the bike UCI legal. I hear the breaking in, adjustment period is a beotch. So I'm going to be riding on my lonesome this weekend so that no one hears the howls of pain as I learn to adapt. I love that cheapo Performance tri saddle, and having to cut 5 cm off the nose of it (where I dont even ride, thank you) is just not right.

So, thanks Mark. You do wonderful work. I hope you and Lolly loved that little Cab. '05 was a very good year.

The Wheels I have...

2009-03-04T12:54:00.003-05:00

Ok, I swore it would never happen, but I'm a wheel slut. I've started in one of those programs, that meets nightly, so that I can stand up and stammer, Hello, My name is Karen. I'm a wheel slut. And then the crowd murmurs... "Hello, Karen."

Alright, its a dream. Maybe. Cliff swears that wheels are breeding in my house.

The wheels I love...

I have a Hed 3 clincher (aluminum rim) for my tt bike. Is it even possible to knock one of these wheels out of true? Its fast. Like I tell everyone, any absence of speed on the tt bike is not the fault of the equipment. Its fast, it spins up fast, and it holds speed. On a non-windy day, its just a dream. Go down to the Dismal Dash and that cross wind section in the last 5 miles is a different kind of dream. Nightmarish.

Pete told me once that I wasn't one of those "weensy" girls and that I should just go. So I do. I think weensy is a euphemism for flat chested. He didn't say...

I have a Renn 575 disc on the rear. It absolutely does the job. And at $500 it was a sure whole lot easier to swallow than a Zipp disc. And since I have never seen ANY concrete evidence that one disc is substantially faster than another, I'll pocket that savings, thank you. Needless to say, its a clincher, like all my wheels. There has been some interesting studies on the speed of clinchers vs. tubulars, and besides that, gluing tubulars is not my idea of fun.

For race wheels I won a set of Zipp 404's, clincher, dimples, with a wireless powertap. Yes, I'm a lucky wheel slut. How do I like them? Jury is still out. The ride is ROUGH. Yes, they are fast, but there have been races where I think my hands are going to quit and leave for China. That said, they are pretty, they are fast, and they are mine. And I think I'll keep them.

What do I ride everyday? Mavic Kyrium SSL's. I'm also a cheap wheel slut and I have been lucky to find great deals on great wheels. Yes, I know there are lighter wheels. And there are cheaper wheels. But these wheels are bomb proof and rarely, if ever need to be trued. It is a pain if you break a spoke as Mavic has different spokes for all the wheels, but that's why I have friends like Ben at 3Sports, and my team mate Brian. They always have stuff laying around to get me back on the road in a jiffy. So on sale, these are the go to wheels in the house.

My favorite road wheels... the great Mavic Kyrium SE wheels- I think they were a limited edition, have a red spoke, and I got them for a song on sale, with a coupon and a double secret handshake. I ride them, race them, hit pot holes with them, and love them.

Last summer Chainlove was on a Reynolds wheel tear and I got a set of the Reynolds Attack wheels. Sharon whined so much about how I got the deal that I let her have them. Chainlove... now Bonktown, my kind of place. There is nothing like getting a 1000 set of wheels for less than 500... carbon to boot. Now they live at the Sweatsalot residence and just dream of coming to Camp Runamuck to visit their friends...

I think the best wheels for racing are the ones that are fast, that aren't going to give you heart failure if you break them. Same with a frame. I can race the Zipps because I didn't pay for them. If I had, they'd probably sit in the den. The rest of the wheels will probably outlast me, and were not so expensive that my cheap little heart would break if I had to replace them.

Delightful or Frightful?

2009-03-02T08:45:00.002-05:00

I guess its all in your perspective.

I had to drive home from Waldorf to Goochland in the snow last night. I have 4 wheel drive on the Queen Cab, so I was pretty safe. Not! Silly drivers kept wiping out all around me. Folks, learn how to drive. It was silly slick and aholes kept trying to zip around lines of cars into the deep section of the road, and would inevitably end up in a ditch.

Needless to say, that hour and a half drive took well over four hours. It was wild.

And boo hiss to VDOT. I finally saw a few of their trucks on 64 right at my exit. I followed them off the highway where they lifted their blades. What, you couldn't continue to plow? Geez, that pissed me off.

I hope that Gina got home from the shows... she took George home with her. While I'm trying to get back in shape, Gina is going to show George, and her husband is going to run him. All the way home I kept worrying about Gina heading north into the storm.

This morning I got up to about 8-9" of the white stuff. Its all in how you look at it. The little black dogs went out and had a glorious time. It wasn't long until Bob and Petey looked like little abominable snowdogs. Dallas the Doberman... he was not amused. He stood pressed up to the back door trying in vain to keep that nasty white stuff from touching him. He waited, not patiently, for me to shovel a path for him so that he could do his business.

The little guys, thought that was funny as hell.

Gangs in Salt Lake?

2009-02-27T08:28:00.003-05:00

"Salt Lake City police reportedly made an arrest in the home burglary of Garmin-Slipstream cyclist David Zabriskie on Thursday, but have only recovered one car of the numerous items taken. According to the Deseret News, the rider's Toyota Scion was recovered by a Salt Lake City gang unit while it was staking out the home of a fugitive in South Salt Lake. " (from Cycling News")

As God is my witness, I thought that only Osmonds lived in Salt Lake...

I hope that now that the leads are there that DZ gets his stuff back, especially his Marvel statues. A man has to have his stuff, you know.

I worry about my bike stuff all the time. But, I really do have the best security system... no, not the ADT, and no not the 12 gauge... its Dallas, my very sweet, very big, doberman. Yeah, come on into my house... Dallas looooves strangers. While Dallas has you pinned, little Petey-wheetie will rip out your ankles.

Things you don't want to see...

2009-02-26T09:21:00.003-05:00

I work in the top floor of a building on the top of a hill. Prime buzzard territory. The buzzards use our building as a launch pad to soar. All in all, I think its pretty cool. Watching them as they glide, and change direction by twisting a feather... I have pure envy.

Except it's spring. And little baby buzzards come from somewhere. Buzzards inflagrante delecto on my window sill is just not one of those things that does it for me.

Really, get a room. Somewhere else. Please.

It could be worse. A friend of mine had the pleasure of working in the Old USFG building in B'more when the peregrines were such a big hit. He loved them. Except that they tended to choose to eat their lunch outside his window. Usually at the same time that he was eating his lunch. Fresh pigeon entrails anyone?

One week, no one died

2009-02-26T08:38:00.002-05:00

It's been a whole week since I've run, ridden, or walked for more than a few hundred yards. I finally decided that if I didn't let my calf tear heal, I was going to be in for a long, and very frustrating season. So instead of that, I've been subjected to a very long and frustrating week.

So far... no one has died.

It's been a very close call though.

I have a new co-worker who insists on listening to all my negotiations from over the fence. Before I hang up the phone, he is prairie dogging it, wanting to know all the details. We may just have to play a game of whack a mole if this keeps up.

Its really funny how your body gets used to a certain level of serotonin from exercise. Quit cold turkey and its like your local crack head decides to mind meld with you. My body is screaming for a fix. Those nasty little lbs that have decided to join the crack head in my body haven't exactly been welcome guests, either.

Tonight I have my tt bike in the Queen Cab, and I'm going to throw it on a trainer and spin easy as the rest of the team does a maniac drill on the computrainers at Endorphin. I'm hoping that I can trick my body into thinking it has done something.

And maybe I'll get thru the rest of the week without getting arrested.

Saddle Review- Terry Butterfly

2009-02-25T08:12:00.003-05:00

The saddle that works for you, probably wont work for me and vice versa. I've given away more saddles than I have shoes, and I have a lot of shoes. My saddle for the road bikes, the Terry Butterfly. Like 99% of women I know, its the one saddle that women can actually sit on their seat bones on, and that isn't so wide that it chafes. After about a year the saddle "stuff" gets too soft and I get a new one and give the old one to a new rider to start on.

I've had Fizik saddles, Bontrager saddles, the Felt saddle on my track bike is a torture device. Strangely enough, the only other saddle that I've tolerated for any length of time was the cheap Fuji saddle that was on my cross bike. Why that one was ok, I don't know as it was hard as a brick.

I went thru a whole mess of saddles to find one for the tt bike. Getting off the bike after a particularly hard tt and be bleeding... not too nice. Believe it or not, the best tt saddle for me was the cheapest one... the Performance Bike Forte TT one. I think I got it on sale for about 30 bucks.

Unfortunately, unless I saw about 5 cm off the front of the saddle, my bike is not UCI legal and I wont be able to ride it at Masters Nats unless I get an exemption. So I bought one of the Adamo saddles, and got a zip tie to cinch in the rails in the front to make it narrower. Its been sitting by my computer all winter begging to be put on the bike. And I keep looking at it wondering how bad its going to hurt me until I get used to it. I've heard the first few weeks are right rough.

Swannee got one though. I guess riding on the Adamo is much better than riding on his old tt saddle's rails!

Juice Plus is gone

2009-02-19T10:29:00.002-05:00

http://www.velonews.com/article/88172/juice-plus-folds-in-the-11th-hour

All the women down here in Virginia were thrilled when little Rachel Warner got signed by Juice Plus. Here was a local girl, who worked her tail off, making good in a big way.

Then Tony Billota was so thrilled when the team signed Laura Van Gilder, and it looked like the team was poised to really do things in a big way. He was telling me how the Van Dessel team was going to put on a big women's race in Waynesboro, that would feature his girls.

Its a shame that when the economy tanks, so do women's teams. It takes so much effort to get a good women's team going, and so little to put them in the toliet.

I sure hope that all the girls, especially Rachel, land rubber side down.

Cure for what ails ya

2009-02-18T11:26:00.003-05:00

Lets face it, saddle sores suck. J says that I have a Princess Butt, and I have to admit that she is right.

When I do my new women's rides, I always start off with the hygiene lecture. And everyone is always grossed out. Hey, hygiene is very important when you are talking about hot, sweaty, dark areas.

Rule 1: As soon as possible, take off those nasty shorts.
Rule 2: Never wear shorts two days in a row without washing them.
Rule 3: on short rides you probably don't need chamois butter
Rule 4: On long rides, and tt's you do. On really long rides you may need to add more later in the ride.
Rule 5: some chamois creams come off the shorts in the wash easier than others. Vaseline has a bad habit of not coming out...
Rule 6: deforestation is a good thing... (no, I'm not explaining it here, you know what I'm talking about!

I used to make my own chamois cream. Hey, the stuff is expensive. Usually we're talking about a tub of Vaseline, and some antibiotic ointment. The Vaseline has the added benefit of polishing your saddle for you. But see Rule 5 about stuff not washing out...

So I have a few favorites;

Moo Cream: What I really like about this stuff is that it was given away for FREE by the caseload at tt's a few years ago. i still have some of the individual packets which conveniently store in a back pocket for on the road usage. Its cool, not too thick, washes well, and does a decent job for a fairly long time.

Badger Balm: Comes in a little tin and is kind of pricey, but when you already have a sore, it does wonders healing them up.

Bag Balm: Almost as good as Badger Balm, but it comes in a bigger tin, and costs alot less.

Butt Butt'r: Ah, relief! I generally use this before I have issues and switch to the Balms when I have issues. Its good, it lasts a pretty long time, and it doesn't have that unpleasant tingling you can get with some creams.

If you get a boil... you have to take care of it. Hot washcloths, and sometimes a drawing cream will do. If you keep getting them in the same place like I do, you probably have a fit or structural issue. I have a structural issue, and there isn't much I can do about it. But having to have to get a scarred up saddle sore cut out is not fun. Trust me on this. Prevention is a much nicer option.

See I was able to say all that without having to resort to pictures. The girls on my rides will be shocked!

Hello from India

2009-02-18T10:39:00.002-05:00

I used a JC Penny credit card a month or so ago, the first time I've ever used it. Got the bill and sent off a check. Then I got another statement with a 20.00 late fee attached. I mailed the check in plenty of time to get there, so needless to say, I was a bit miffed and decided to call.

Where did my call go? Why, India, of course!

Sorry. Please direct me back to the US. Not that I have anything against India, or people in India, but I live in the US, and I want US companies to keep jobs here. So I figure the more people who demand to be transfer ed back to the US, the more those companies who shipped the jobs off to save money will have to staff offices here, which at some point in time will negate any savings in shipping our jobs overseas.

Yeah, it probably wont work, but I'm a fan of tilting at windmills.

And kudos for JC Penny for taking the charge off. It never hurts to ask, especially when you are sure that you are right.

Happiness is...

2009-02-17T10:45:00.002-05:00

J giving me a FREE Chipoltle card from her hubby Dave's race packet from a Sweetheart 8k he did. Yum, steak soft tacos with hot salsa... Yum

And better yet, FREE!

Life is good.

And wasnt it a cool thing to see the little Garmin/Chipotle rider Tom Peterson hanging onto Levi's wheel yesterday when everyone else went by the wayside. I think he deserves some soft tacos, too. And class act on Levi to let the little guy shine at the finish line. Levi didn't need the win, he needed the time. But this win to Peterson will make him a STAR.

I was awful glad to have been watching from the sofa yesterday. I hate decending in the rain... But I do want one of the Specialized helmet covers. Come on Specialized, make them available to the rest of us slobs!

Too much wine makes a whole lot of whine

2009-02-16T09:31:00.002-05:00

Friday I scored 2 seats to a Spanish wine dinner at TJ's at the Jefferson. It wasn't as nice as when Lemaire was open, but it was still the Jefferson and it was still the best meal in town. The Jefferson throws these every now and again, and if you happen to hear about one, you'd better jump on it quick, or you'll be like J, on the wait list... sitting at home.
Openers- cornmeal crusted oysters with Palicio Bornos Verdejo Rueda '07. Yum. I hate oysters. I could have eaten a bucket of these, and the wine was perfect. (inexpensive, to boot.)
Course 1- Lobster bisque w/caramelized fennel, tarragon, and semi-dried tomatoes served with Valminor Albarino Rias Baixas '07. I love Albarino's. They taste like the shore. The lobster bisque was wonderful and i thought Cliff was going to lick the bowl...
Course 2- Duck 4ways... seared breast, leg confit, "dirty rice, and foie gras- served with a wonderfully, earthy Finca Sobreno Crianza Toro'05. If there was ever a year for wine, it has to be '05... This was the best dish of the night and reminded me of the pheasant and wild rice my Mom used to cook after my Dad and I would go pheasant hunting. And the wine... if you bbq... you should run buy some. Its very inexpensive. It's perfect for meat. (and was pretty good alone, too.)
Course 3- Mustard crusted rack of lamb, sweet garlic risotto, brussels sprouts, smoked bacon - with Mas Sinen Priorat '05. If someone asks you what you want, you want a case of this wine. Its pretty expensive- about $50 a bottle, but man, was it good. I drank waaay to much of it, and was really glad at the time that I did.
Dessert- Grand Marnier Chocolate Molten cake with Balsamic marinated strawberries and Patricia Cream "sherry" montilla Morales NV. I hate Sherry, nuff said. But the strawberries were killer.

All that for $75.00, which included tax and tip. Jealous?

You should be. No worries though, you eat that, and then the next day get on a bike and you are guaranteed going to suffer...

J's hubby went down to run a race and dropped her off at my house at 0'dark 30. I handed her the clicker and went back to bed.

An hour later I got up and we slowly headed out on the roads for 30 miles of whinefest. My head hurt. My leg hurt. It was cold. It was windy. Damn, it even snowed. I think my hair even hurt. Three glasses of $50 wine will do that to you. The other glasses joined in there to beat on me as well. It was not a ride that I'd care to repeat.

Sunday was round two. Col. Sweatsalot, J, and Cliff took turns ripping my legs off on my hilly Hadensville ride. For as bad as I felt, and for as much as I tried to hide what horrible shape I'm in, I had to be thrilled with J and Sharon. Sharon was like a very fit race horse, all up on her toes, grabbing the bit, and throwing in a little exuberant buck every now and again. It was fun to see. And J, what can you say... even with a dead headwind the whole way out, she would charge to the front and sprint up the hills.

And the friendly black lab was back... and ran in and out of the pack for a good 1/2 mile until Cliff scared him. (Big meanie...)

So today is a recovery day. If I get the gumption up I may just finish my taxes... or I may just take a nap.

Oh, and by the way, congrats to Dr Marc on his win yesterday at the Wolfpack crit... even though he sprints like a girl. Oh, yeah, maybe that's why he won!

RIIIIP!

2009-02-10T08:29:00.002-05:00

I went out for an ez run last night since J decided that she was going to run with me today. J BERRY BERRY FAST, and me not so much any more... so I was going to save up whatever speed that I could muster for tonight so that I could almost keep up with her without barfing.

Probably a bad move... whenever you change your stride, bad things happen. About 2 miles in, I took one too many strides and the calf just went. Or maybe its the Achilles attachment. Whichever, that was the end of me running last night, and I had to hobble a mile + back to the Queen Cab.

It would have to be on my good leg, too.

On the bright side, I did find a dime. So while I'm sulking about not being able to run, I can treasure my new found wealth.

From the frying pan to...

2009-02-09T08:21:00.003-05:00

Saturday was blissfully warm, and I yondered out to get a season's worth of Vitamin D. Too bad there was that pesky wind stuff, oh and the fires everywhere. I can understand people being addicted, but I can't understand why they feel the need to throw thier cigarette butts out the window. If they were so dirty that they couldn't have them in the car, maybe they shouldn't be smoking in the car. Just a thought...

Those flying cigarettes were causing fires all over the counties. I drove thru one, with the good ole' volunteers working hard to put it out before it burned a house down. I bet the a-hole who threw the nasty thing didn't even realize the heart ache he was causing his neighbors...

Sunday we got a group together to do my hill ride. Just head out 250 towards C'ville and the road goes up, and then down, and then up, and then down. Nice long, steady hills to get the body thinking about the season to come.

Col. Sweatsalot showed us all what valor under fire really is when she selflessly sacrificed herself to fend off the nice Lab that came out to run with us up the road. Sharon veered into his path so that he couldn't lick us to death and then proceeded to try to give him a drink with her bottle of Heed. She might need to go back to the firing range, as her aim in the wind was a wee bit off. I was the lucky recipient of a full body wash with Heed... enough that if I was stranded in the woods... and had nothing to eat for days except the Heed coating my body, I would have survived. What are friends for... Thanks, Sharon. Me and my sticky bike salute you!

Oh, and a nod to J... J couldn't make it to the ride since she was up in F'burg kicking every one's ass in the Sweetheart 4 miler. When I talked to her last night, she didn't say that she won, just that she and her hubby, Mr. Negs won the couple's combined division and scored a nice dinner at a swank restaurant.

Sweethearts 4 MileFredericksburg, VA02/08/2009 Cat Time GrandPlc Place Name City ST Time min/mile Ag Prix--- ----- ------------------------ --------------- -- -------- -------- -- ----- Women's Overall 14 1/1 Julia Smith Tappahannock VA 00:24:56 6:14 40 1000

On a tough course- I think I'd be happy with that one.

There's money out there

2009-02-05T08:25:00.003-05:00

Ok, I am El Cheapo Delux. As a friend once told me, it's not what you make, it's what you spend. If you don't believe me, that little old man who froze to death when the power company put the regulator on his house because he didn't pay his bill... well he left approximately $500,000 in his will to local charity. ( Now I probably would have paid the bill out of that hunk of change, I must admit.)

Anyways, coming in to the office I was listening to NPR and this frosted me... You know that huge bill you get from your kid's college, and how they kind of lump fees together? Are you paying for health insurance for your kid in that lump fee? Do you have health insurance on your kid? Are you paying 2x for health insurance for your kid without knowing it? Call the college and ask. The guy in the story was paying $1100 to the college every semester (that's $2200 a year boys and girls) for something that he already was paying for. The college fessed up, and after proving that he had insurance on his kid, cancelled the charge GOING FORWARD.

It really does pay to read things. Like contracts. You'd be amazed what gets stuck in contracts that people never read. Like a car that I bought... I had told the sales manager that I wanted the car and was not paying for rust proofing, insurance, paperwork, sunshine, or any other crap. I go to the paperwork dept, and they hand me the contract, and tell me to sign at the sticky. Being anal, I insist on reading everything... and find over $1000 in hidden charges. So I walked out. See yah, wouldn't want to be ya. The sales manager almost had a stroke chasing me down. They expect to get away with this stuff. Read everything.

And if you are like me, and you surf for hours to get the best deal... look at your receipts and the confirmation notice. I understand that Nashbar and Performance are notorious for adding charges or taking off discount codes on the final bill. Check your receipts.

I really don't mind paying fair prices for things. I do mind paying more for things than I have to. And I sympathize with US cycling shops who pay more for parts than I can buy them for overseas. Talk to Shimano. There is some kind of a deal going on here, but while I sympathize with you, I can still guy a grouppo from Probike Kit for about 2/3 of what you pay for it. Go figure.

The way I figure it, on my little person's salary you had better be tight. Make the nickles' scream. Paying too much thru inattention is just wrong.

It's a whole new ballgame

2009-02-04T10:10:00.003-05:00

That's what one Senator has commented. It's a whole new ballgame. Citi Group has announced that they now "Get It." Meaning that they are actually going to use that money that you and I, thru our good friends in DC, gave them to do what our good friends meant for the money to be used for. You know, making loans and stuff. They vow not to use that money to pay for other things, like naming a ball park after themselves.

Oops, except that is still what they are going to do. But not with our money, they are going to do it with their money.

Riddle me this... you have this big pot of money, this side came from DC, the other money came from other investments.... now when you go to give bonus checks, pay for parties, or name a stadium, doesn't that money still come from the same big pot of money?

It's hard to justify your corporate name on a ball park, tennis match, party, or gasp, a bike race if you are laying your employees off. Look at all the big name bike races that are getting cancelled right and left.

Strangely enough, there was an article out yesterday that the grass roots cycling is doing just fine, thank you. Our little races, and racers are marching on.

Pay outs might suffer, goodie bags might go unfilled and some teams that have always done race reimbursement may not get to do it this year. The local race scene itself should do just fine. I still believe that while some people might holler about payouts, they really aren't racing for money anyway. Heck, most of my payouts wouldn't pay for the gas to get to the race, and few actually pay for the race entry itself.

It's going to be a very interesting year...

What do you do while recovering?

2009-02-02T09:00:00.002-05:00

Well, if you are my teammate Mark... you buy a cool new Alan frame to replace the one that was crushed, ripped, smashed, basically just obliterated in the crash. Then because you are bored to tears, you surf ebay day and night until you find the tricked out Trek TT frame of your dreams. Flames, he had to get the bike of my dreams...

If you find Mark in a ditch somewhere, and the Trek is missing... I'm sure I can come up with an alibi.

Go back to work, Mark. I cant stand the jealousy anymore!

Welcome to all the new officials!

2009-02-01T17:55:00.003-05:00

How cool was it to be in Toano today and see some 30 newbie officials taking the test! Too cool for school! Special congrats to Mr. Nasty and Col. Sweatsalot for passing the test with flying colors. And Carolyn, I bet it's been a long time since you had to take a test, open book or otherwise. Congrats to all y'all!

And a quick interuption to mention that the other Karen who got creamed by the car... (God love her and I hope she is very happily in a percoset haze about now...) yeah, that was NOT me. Thank God for small miracles. Now I might have been hoping to get hit by a bus (not happening in rural Goochaland) while I was dealing with the wind this afternoon, it did not actually happen. Look Ma, no stitches. So stop calling me, or send cash to make me feel better. You know, from riding in the wind, not from getting hit by a car. Cause that didn't happen...

Anywho, the officials clinic is always fun because you get to catch up and get the gossip from the rest of the folks.

Like poor Swanee, slaving away at Contes, only getting to ride 200 miles a week and is soo behind the 8 ball (bite me.) Sally found this cool website cheapo air (?) and scored 2 tickets to California for 250.00 and Pete is going out west to train. Sally is a girl after my own heart. We might have to call her El Cheapo Delux 2. Sally even uses Priceline. Pete, if you rub it in one more time that you have time to train 200 miles a week, I'm going to have to hurt you. Not that I'm cranky about my lack of training time, or anything. Grrrr....

Then there was our favorite chief ref and Ruth protoge', Danielle, telling us how not to fry a camera. I live in fear of frying cameras. Now I have one more thing in my life to be a techo-phobe about. I can just hear people whispering, "yeah, we used to have this great equipment until Karen got her wicked little hands on it... now its toast, like all her phones..."

Officiating, its scary stuff. Bike racers, easy. Equipment... now that's another story.

And my ride when I got home. It was warm. Yeah! And it was some kinda windy. Boo! But any day on the bike is a good day. Thats what I kept telling myself as my legs fell off on the big hill with the head wind.

And no, I didn't steal one of those great massage tables from the wonderful facility we were at this morning. What good is a massage table without a handsome Swedish guy to put the moves on you? Oh, well...

Killin' the 'trainer

2009-01-30T09:48:00.002-05:00

Thursday nights is Cycor's team computrainer nights. We head out to Endorphin and generally stink and slime up the place as we grunt, strain and groan around terrible courses. You have to do rides like these with your buddies because you can't let "normal" people see you looking like that. We look bad. Trust me.

Carolyn Goble of Team Natures Path begged us to clean up the gym after we were done. She rides on Saturdays and just couldnt face the carnage after the Cycor people. I told her to wear her Wellies... you know rubber knee boots. I doubt we could flood the place past about ankle deep. We try hard, though. Its not unusual to have the trainers slide on their platform from all the sweat and slime...

Two years ago Big Bill (now Rapidly Diminishing Bill or Mr. Nasty) broke the first computrainer. We were climbing Wintergreen and he was throwning everything and the kitchen sink at the course. First you smelled burning, then there was this terrible whining noise, and then Bill was done for the night. (and two years later, that trainer is still broken :(

Last night was Gregg's turn to trash a trainer. We were going back up Wintergreen, Sharon took it out like she was shot out of a cannon (silly girl), Julie was pulling wkg that only Floyd Landis could pull, and Bill and Gregg were in hot pursuit. Then we started to smell burning, then there was this terrible whining noise and bingo, Gregg was out for the night.

Wintergreen... it kills.

This left Bill and Julie to duke it out for the win. If you ever wanted to know what really takes to climb, you just have to watch J. Its not the watts, I was beating her on straight watts, its the fact that her body weight, and power make her invincible. Damn.

Double Damn. After she hits the top she starts yelling at me. Team mates, some times you just want to kill them. It wasnt bad enough that she smoked me and was DONE, oh no... now she wanted me to really suffer. And Col. Sweatsalot wasnt going to lay down, either. I was so sure that I was going to barf that they got me a trash can.

Yeah, Wintergreen, it kills.

Where else do women average over 200 watts in a training ride, and top 300 steady for the top part of the course...

Thanks to my team mates. That that does not kill us, makes us strong. Too bad we keep killing computrainers. Maybe they need more hard workouts to make them strong, too?

Planned obsolescence

2009-01-27T08:02:00.002-05:00

I hate cell phones. I talk all day on the phone at work, and the last thing in hell I want to do when I get off work is talk on the phone. I don't take pictures with phones, download music, text or anything else. I pretty much have a phone as a way to talk to someone in an emergency. So don't text me. It costs me every time you do it.

Three weeks ago my phone started loosing its charge after a few hours. I went back to Verizon and the tech there told me that I needed a new battery, but because my phone was so old (a year plus) that they no longer carried the batteries and I'd have to go to Batteries Plus. $39.00 later, I had a new battery. Within a few days, that battery wasn't holding a charge, either.

Verizon has this new every two plan, where you get a new or reduced price phone every two years. The catch, the phones just don't seem to last two years. And... you have to get a Verizon phone, and they hose you on the cost.

Since my plan two years was April, I checked out Best Buy. Yep, Best Buy had phones for $29.00. Exactly what I wanted... a vanilla phone. Nope, wouldn't work for me, because it was a different company phone. Huh? Old phone was LG, new phone LG. But the service provider was different.

Now any 12 year old can hack the phone and change the programing. Look what happened with the Iphones. Except I'm not 12, and I can't program ANYTHING. Grrrrr

So I head to Verizon, que in the line and finally get to a very young sales girl who tells me that I have to buy a new phone and the cheapest phone is like $180. I told her to just get the manager... no sense negotiating with someone who has no power to negotiate...

After an hour plus, I walked out with my new, free phone. Except like free puppies, a free phone isn't free. All the charge cords for the old phone of course don't fit the new phone. I'm on the road, I have to have a car charger. Thats almost 30.00. Grrrr. I refused to buy anything else.

So now I have a new phone. I can't wait to see how this one is going to die. My first one allegedly got wet. Not from water, but from water vapor. My $29 Timex is water resistant to 50 meters. Its not waterproof, but it can sure as heck sustain water vaport. What is water vapor, think humidity. The tech guy said that it was probably in my truck on a hot day. No kidding. (Actually, it was probably in my cycling jersey on a hot day.)

So if your phone hasn't died yet, you better make friends with a 12 year old. You're gonna need one soon.

Frozen thoughts

2009-01-26T12:45:00.003-05:00

Sunday the weather conspired against me and I ended up heading out all by my lonesome. By the time I had gotten to the first stop sign I had to stop and zip up a back pocket. That little draft down the back side was a little more than I could stand.

At mile 10 I tried to drink for the first time. Note to self, when you go out on a really cold day, make sure the top is open on your bottles. Mine had frozen shut and I had to hold it in my mouth for a few minutes to thaw it. Then I got it thawed and what water I could get out of the bottle was so cold that I didn't want to drink it.

A few miles later I saw Gwynne (Marshall Mechanical) and her buffo hubby Kevin and friend Matt out running. I know that Gwynne said something to me as I went by, but with the helmet, and skull cap, I think I picked up like 1 out of 5 words. Something like, ".... Karen. Dont ....... cold." I did manage two words, "I'm cold." I bet she couldn't understand them, either.

It's days like this that make you tough for the summer suffering. Or that's the conventional thought anyway. I stayed cold all day, and only warmed up in the tub that night. If I get a bailout, and am able to give myself a retention bonus, I'm seriously considering moving to somewhere warm. This below freezing stuff just plain sucks.

Sharin the love

2009-01-23T08:10:00.003-05:00

You all might remember that right before one of the PLT races, Christina sent out an urgent plea to find a home for a kitten that one of her dogs brought to her. My buddy and team mate Mark Pye took the little fart home. For the next 6 months he worked to heal up an abscess in her shoulder that required two surgeries, and more antibiotics than most third world countries use in a year.

I had lunch with Mark the other day, and here she is... all healed up, and the love of his, and his other cats' lives.

I always feel so blessed to be surrounded by such wonderful, compassionate people in my team. I'd give Mark a kidney. Nuff said.

I'd give one to Paula, too. One a multi-club ride, Paula found a hound puppy in a ditch. The poor thing was starving to death- all skin and bones. I was in Penn. and Paula called me for help. While the rest of the pack went on, she waited until help arrived. Paula will not only rip your legs off on a bike, she has a wonderful heart. I love her.

Sharon's wonderful Mischief died this summer. What did she do? She called the post vet to get her a stray in need.

It's January, and we are about to start kitten season. I bet there is a spay/neuter clinic near you that will do FREE surgeries. Thru the end of March, the Richmond SPCA does free cat surgeries, no questions asked. They will always do pits and pit mixes for free, and the pets of college students and low income folks.

So if you see a family struggling this year, make the suggestion. From working in shelters, I can tell you that stopping the flow of kittens is a worthwhile endeavour. And if you have an empty place in your heart, consider an adult cat.

To Mark, Paula and Sharon (and J, Steve C, James et al...) on my team who have gone out of their way to make the world a better place for the little guys, many thanks. There's a warm place for you.

Welcome Women's Racing!

2009-01-21T12:52:00.002-05:00

Mike added this cool new Women's racing widget. So now maybe women from all over can link together to see who's doing what, why, when, and where. When I recommended Jenn to the newsroll it was because she was a new racer, with typical new racer problems.

You know what I mean... mostly life balance, especially life balance in a tough economy. Sometimes you really do need to decide if you are going to race, or pay bills. Sometimes you need to decide if you are going to ride or do family commitments.

Bike racing is a tough commitment. Sometimes on the speedway type crit courses you can hide the fact that you aren't as fit as you'd like to be. On any crit with a corner... you can't. For most of us though, this is what we do for fun. Or we do it because we have "issues." At some point in our lives though, the real world has to balance out bike racing.

So I'm excited at the new blog list. I know that during bike season my life goes to pot. The grass never gets cut. The weeds overtake the flower beds. My kitchen table disappears underneath all the clean clothes that get piled there. Winter time is a bit more balanced, except this year work has disrupted my real world. Life balance can be a fleeting thing.

This weekend I'm home though, and I'll be damned if I'm going to miss an outside ride. Even if I freeze to death to get it in. Balance also means getting to have time on the bike, outside for a change.

A great day to be standing in the cold...

2009-01-20T08:30:00.002-05:00

I was up in B'more on Friday and Saturday and everywhere you looked there were signs of the upcoming Freezefest. Traffic notices: metro lots will be full, no cars past this point, seek alternative transportation. Plus, my hotel told me in no uncertain terms that I was absolutely, positively to vacate by 10 am on Saturday morning under threat of something exceptionally dire. More dire than going outside when it's 2 degrees? Apparently so.

Our good friends at WABA made the Washington Post with their very generous act to do bike parking for the masses. Way to go guys! I'm thinking the majority of people who bike in today will probably be working in DC and have an office to stash their bikes, but anything that gets bikes into good press is aok in my book.

How am I watching? On a big screen tv at work. I live in the real world. We work today (yesterday, too.)

I do hope DC has lots and lots of those little golf carts to ferry the unwise to a heated shelter. I was watching the news this morning and they were interviewing people taking the train to DC. Its going to be in the 20's. Its going to be a bit breezy. Dress pants and a thin leather jacket are not going to cut it. Neither is dress, hose and heels. Unless people have some Carthardt stuff hidden somewhere I'm expecting human carnage today. Brrr!

Whatever your politics are, this is a hugely great day. Think warm thoughts. There are a lot of people who are going to need them! Smudge pots anyone?